Disaster Musings

This is not a sponsored post! I swear!

2010-12-22T12:54:00.000-05:00

I like earning money.
I also like giving away money.

Oh the conflict!
Which is why I'm (thus far) a big fan of Op4G.

Op4G is basically a market research company with an altruistic bent.
You take their consumer surveys, and they pay you.
What's interesting though, is that they "force" you to give at least 25% of your earnings to one of their non-profit partners.
I mean force in the best possible way of course. Perhaps "allow you to be generous automatically" would be a nicer way to say that.

Now, full disclosure time: the non-profit where I currently work is one of the partners.
So the money is going to support a place with which I do have a direct connection.
But I work in anti-sexual violence advocacy, so I'm pretty confident that it's OK to shamelessly plug on behalf of my job.

So far I'm impressed. I've filled out 4 surveys, made some money for me and made some money for the Alliance.
Best of both worlds! Woo!

The take away?
Go check out Op4G.
Sign up.
Take some surveys.
Get some money and..
Perhaps donate to the Alliance (pretty please)?

Super Bibi!

2010-12-20T14:48:00.001-05:00

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It has come to my attention that I occasionally bring casual conversations around to topics such as sexual assault, teen pregnancy, and reproductive health.

Given I deal with anti-sexual violence advocacy in my day job, teen pregnancy prevention in my freelance work, and reproductive health in my board position I wasn't exactly shocked by this revelation.

It did remind me, however, that I spend a lot of my time dealing with (important) but rather heavy issues.

So, I've decided to post this picture of....

SUPER BIBI!

Because everyone needs a little levity in their life! And a tiny cat wearing a cape is pretty darn cute & funny.

Best gifts for job seekers?

2010-12-17T14:14:00.000-05:00

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Originally I was just going to post a link to an article on CNN.com about the "Best Gifts for Job Seekers" and make generally nice comments about the idea.

Because really, who doesn't like getting gifts? And if you're searching for a job and feeling unusually stressed/confused/cash-strapped then a thoughtful gift might mean the difference between a total meltdown and a successful interview.

And I am going to still make some generally nice comments about the list, and then offer some comments.

So, I thought it was great that the author thought to include both practical interview and self-care related gift ideas.

After weeks of stressful job hunting, I'm sure a massage would be great.
(I'm also sure a massage would be great at almost anytime, but that's neither here nor there.)
Interview outfit-great idea.
Resume writing service- unique and perhaps helpful.

Overall, I think it's a nice list.
But I do wonder whether it's actually a list of great gifts for job seekers.

It's a list, and I'm sure job seekers would enjoy all the things mentioned (except for a fancy leather portfolio and/or pen...as I'm sure 99% of people would prefer you gave them $150 instead of a nice pen), but are the things on the list actually likely to help you get an interview or succeed in getting a job?
Not so sure.

Personal connections are often key, and I'm not sure that a snazzy new pantsuit will get you a job offer when you're competing against someone with insider help/knowledge/support.
Ditto for a new hairdo, or even a massage.
All of those things sound great, but are they really helping with the job hunt?

So my list of "best gifts for job seekers" would have a few additions:
1. Share your personal knowledge/leverage your personal connections. Instead of buying something for the job seeker in your life, help them in a less tangible but perhaps more worthwhile way. Offer to introduce them to people you know, help them set up informational interviews etc. This to me seems like the best gift you can give (extra points if you thrown in $200).

2. Finance their trip to an upcoming conference or networking event. Conferences are EXPENSIVE, but they are a great place to meet people in the field and make connections. Why would you pay for a fancy career counselor, when the job seeker might be well aware of what they want to do/where they want to do it, but they know they need to make that personal connection first (see #1).

3. Ask them what they need, not what they want. I want on any given day to eat fancy food, and enjoy some serious pampering. When I'm looking for a job, what I need is support, support, and more support. Money is support, some of the self-care items listed in the original article are support, as are items #1 and 2 listed above.

False Reporting in the Media (Again): Why it’s such a problem

2010-12-16T13:02:00.000-05:00

(I'm reposting this from the Alliance blog. I spent ALL morning finding these stats, and wanted to share a little more widely).

This morning I was saddened to see 10 Google alerts and a lead article on People.com regarding the arrest of a New York City-based TV weatherwoman. An occasional contributor on Good Morning American, Heidi Jones, was recently suspended from her job after being charged by city police with filing a false attempted rape report.
The headlines ranged from: “TV Weatherwoman Charged with Lying About Attempted Rape” (People.com), to “Cops: NYC Meteorologist Lied About Rape” (Fox News) but the stories themselves all told the same story:

“Jones claimed a man attacked her while she was jogging on Sept. 24 and dragged her into a wooded area, only to flee when tourists approached. The same man approached her in the park two months later, Jones told police. Police soon began to doubt her story, and Jones later admitted she made it up because she was having problems in her relationship and thought it would gain her sympathy.” (People.com)

As you can imagine, the response from online commentators and journalist has run the gamut from outrage to barely-concealed excitement.

Because really, what’s more new-worthy and ‘sexy’ than a very public false report rape story?
The problem with all of the attention and excitement is that it detracts from a very real and dangerous issue: the propagation of the myth that women frequently file false rape reports.

In fact, according to various law enforcement databases and research studies I only 2% of rape reports are later found to be false. Other studies have found false report rates of up to 5.6%–but the range of 2-6% corresponds to false report rates for other major crimes such as burglary.
Another important point brought up by a doctoral candidate and researcher at American University is that:

“A primary myth about false rape reports focuses on the belief that women “cry rape” because they are seeking revenge on men who have wronged them in some way. However, according to [studies], the reality is that the vast majority of false allegations “are actually filed by people with serious psychological and emotional problems.” And notably, people who falsely file claims usually do not name specific individuals, but instead “involve only a vaguely described stranger.” These research findings support the theory that people who falsely allege rape do so not out of desire for revenge against a specific person, but because they seek general attention and sympathy.”

Sounds pretty familiar, right?

Ms. Jones admitted that she made up the assault because she was “having problems in her relationship and was seeking sympathy.” So really what we have here is a individual woman who is likely suffering from psychological and emotional problems.

One woman does not an epidemic of false reports make.

Yet the media attention to this case is likely to be prolonged and unsympathetic. And according to research, this type of unwarranted attention on false rape reports can be very damaging.

“Print media portrayals of rape that are not representative in the aggregate of the circumstances in which rape typically occurs may do little more than reinforce stereotypical notions of what constitutes “real rape.” The types of rape reported in the media tend to be those that have features that are in keeping with the classic stereotype of rape. Media stories may also be presented in such a way as to suggest that the victim precipitated the attack or is making a false allegation.

The same researchers also concluded that the reliance on rape stereotypes and rape myths in media coverage can ultimately have a chilling effect on report rates, prosecution, and conviction rates. They caution that:

“Stereotypical notions of rape have been found to negatively impact rape prosecution. The negative portrayal of both male and female rape victims in the press may have an adverse impact on whether such crimes are subsequently reported to the police. [Ultimately] newspaper articles that frame rape victims’ behaviour in a negative manner may reinforce rape myths and fuel public misconceptions of sex crimes, which in turn may have a negative consequences for a victim’s self-conceptions of his or her experience and the criminal justice’s response to sex crimes.”

While it’s obviously very upsetting to learn that Ms. Jones likely fabricated and then falsely reported an attack, I think it’s clear that the media attention is damaging to both victims and the general public. I think it’s a shame that we expect so little from the media; instead of framing this story in a way that addresses rape myths and the rarity of false reports, this rather salacious approach is likely doing real harm.

Degree= Internship?

2010-12-12T12:09:00.000-05:00

Well thanks CNN. Your incredibly depressing article "Is an Internship the New Entry Level Job" about the plight of 20-somethings in the job market actually makes me feel better about my current work situation!

I don't think that was the point of this article, but hey I'll take it!

Really though, it's pretty dismal.

According to the report,

Full-time employment has dropped 9 percentage points among 18-to-29-year-olds since 2006, leaving only 41 percent of millennials with full-time jobs, according to "Millennials: A Portrait of Generation Next," a report released by Pew Research Center in February.

In addition to feeling really aggravated anytime someone uses the term Millennial (which I find a particularly stupid sounding name), I also feel pretty sad that so many people are spending a lot of time and money for an undergraduate degree that leaves them with...an internship!

I also have to wonder if calling internship the new entry level makes sense.

Do employers really consider an internship a type of entry level position?

I'm really not so sure they do, especially after being told in a meeting recently that the title of "intern" is a resume killer. Is that true across the board, who knows? Might it be true in some fields or for some hiring managers, probably?

So really, is an internship the way to go?
Or is it better to volunteer in the field in which you want to be employed and take a day job to pay the bills?

Fall round up from NYC, STL & beyond!

2010-12-11T12:45:00.003-05:00

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Well, I've failed as a blogger for most of the fall.

In my defense, I received a "day"motion at my job (I made this word up, and despite some confusion from friends and family, it is indeed a good thing), and have been trying extra hard to network, network, network while really enjoying all the city has to offer.

We've hosted out of town guests, traveled to STL for thanksgiving food/fun, and are now planning a trip to my hometown for my little brother's 21st birthday.

Throw in some major wedding planning (dress, venue, caterer, list, photographer, and bakery= DONE!) and I guess blogging just kind of fell by the wayside.

But things are settling down a bit, so I guess I'm back? Or back-ish?

What I'm reading this weekend...

2010-10-31T11:16:00.003-04:00

All about "pregnancy centers."
Check out the NYTimes article here.

I bet you can guess how I feel about the proposed legislation mentioned in this article!

Italy in October!!

2010-10-30T22:15:00.000-04:00

We're so lucky that Ben has almost-family in Italy.
It gives us a great excuse to vacation there as often as possible, and we can usually stay for free right outside of Venice!

This time we were lucky enough to stay in a cute B&B for Padova (Padua) for 4 days, and head into Venice and some of the countryside for day trips.

Then off to Florence for 3 days, where we stayed in an awesome hotel and also took the time to travel to some of the smaller cities (Sienna, San Gimignano) nearby.

Add in one day in Milan, and you have a pretty awesome trip.
The only downside?
Coming back and being unable to fit in to all of your clothing comfortably due to massive amounts of pasta, cheese, wine..,and more pasta.

Pictures to come tomorrow!

Escape from NYC 2010

2010-10-29T22:05:00.001-04:00

In my defense, my 3 measly postings from this month make a lot more sense when you consider that this month I spent:
*9 days in Italy
*4 days hosting a fabulous house guest & co-hosting a party in my apt.
*3 days traveling to/from & participating in the fall NLNI conference

That's 16 days total of craziness in just one month.
Plus of course the days spent getting ready for the trips and recovering from jet-lag etc.
Oh, and my family visited over one of those weekends, and I took little S to see Wicked!
So really, it's been an exceptionally busy month.

Next up, deciding if I want to participate in this year's Nanowrimo (don't know what that is? check it out online here), figuring out a little more job stuff, and spending T-giving in STL with B's family.

Oh, and I think we still need to send out a few save the dates.
I'm exhausted just thinking about it all!

One vote and the course of history?

2010-10-04T20:43:00.000-04:00

I've been watching The Tudors - The Complete Second Season on Netflix (I swear this is not a sponsored post!). I have to sneak episodes since B is not a fan.

He was the one who originally suggested the series as our next show (after we finished The Wire: The Complete Series)...until he remembered 1/2 an episode in that he doesn't like British accents or period dramas. I, however, think British accents are adorable and love period drama. So when he's stuck at work or away on business I break out the Netflix and plug away at the series.

Anyway, I've just begun season 2 and Henry the 8th is trying to break with Rome. Most people know the story, so I won't rehash.

The part that really floored me though, was the fact that during the course of an afternoon they voted on the issue and it was basically done.
I realize that's an oversimplification, and the show is not exactly historically accurate...but I was still pretty astounded by the idea that history was shaped in part by a simple vote.

Can you imagine anything happening now after a single vote?
Or rather, can you imagine anything making it past the bureaucracy that is often characteristic of our government in a timely manner so that a vote could even happen?

Pretty crazy!

The least helpful job advice I've ever seen:

2010-10-01T17:02:00.003-04:00

Don't cry, and other interviewing tips

Really?
Thanks CNN!
I'll be sure to keep that in mind.

Sniffle.

Lemur vs. Lemming: AKA the Best Work Conversation Ever

2010-10-01T12:28:00.002-04:00

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I had a real post ready. Or rather, I was going to write a real post. A serious one! And then I had this conversation with a co-worker (during personal time of course) and felt the need to share.

SS: I sometimes think twitter is a fad

SS: I do it--but only because i'm a lemur.

SS: or crap, lemming. I mean lemming

L: hahahah!!!!

L: a lemur! I love it

SS: my face is red

SS: thank goodness for online chatting

SS: you can't see!

L: hahah it's such a cute image in my head, of lemurs flocking to a cliff

SS: urg

SS: I was close

SS: they sound so similar

L: and to be honest i dont even totally know what a lemming is

L: not what i thought! http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2273/2352349809_51b37bd708.jpg

SS: whhhat? no way!

L: I sort of always pictured something penguiny but not a bird

SS: I thought they looked more cat-like

SS: clearly no one has any idea what a lemming really is!

SS: they're rodents..ew

SS: I think we should change the phrase. lemurs are much cuter

L: lemurs probably have some senseless pack behavior we could comment on

SS: we should find out

SS: and then totally coin a new phrase

L: "The presence of female social dominance sets lemurs apart from most other primates and mammals; Female aggression is often associated with, but not limited to, feeding"

L: I think there's useful material in there

SS: Hmm.. feeding frenzy and female aggression. That does indeed seem like a good breeding ground for a new phrase

SS: And perhaps even semi-relevant to anti-violence work!

SS: Score!

L: there was something else about how scientists hypothesize that the lady lemurs get aggressive because they have more at stake than the men, what with the need to reproduce

SS: ugh. lets leave that one out of the pile

L: haha

L: GET OFF MY PIZZA I NEED TO HAVE A BABY!

SS: last thing we need to do is create another phrase that makes women sound like baby-crazed man eaters

Funny job find of the day..

2010-10-01T10:00:00.000-04:00

Found at the bottom of a job announcement:

Spanish preferred.

I think they meant "Spanish speaker" preferred.
At least, I hope that's what they meant.
Isn't there a law against that otherwise?!

Is nothing safe?? Deception at the farmers market?

2010-09-24T09:55:00.000-04:00

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Well this is just depressing.

I guess even the farmers market isn't safe anymore.
It makes sense, although it makes me sad.

It's now so 'in' to buy local that farmers markets must be growing and becoming more profitable.
So of course, there are people who are trying to make some money by lying to customers.

Check out the NYTimes article here.

Pesticides in "organic" fruits and veggies and produce from Mexico being packaged as locally grown.

Urg.

A little re-post on behalf of Faith Aloud..

2010-09-22T10:55:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I feel silly posting about home-made hamburgers one day, and great non-profit work the next..but that's pretty much where my interests lie and how my brain works!

So today I bring you a link to a recent blog post written by Krista Taves. Krista is currently the board president of Faith Aloud..an organization that is very near and dear to my heart. I had my first "real" job at Faith Aloud after I finished college, and my 18 or so months at the organization helped me really define my academic, personal and career interests. I learned so much about non-profit management, the importance of faith in reproductive justice work, and why it's important to stay passionate about the issues that should matter most.

I'm currently serving on the national board of Faith Aloud and am really excited to be passing along Krista's thoughts. Although I come from a very different faith perspective, I loved reading her post.
So go check it out here.
Learn more about Faith Aloud and about the people who are working to further the cause!

On behalf of Ben's arteries: I'm on a hamburger strike!

2010-09-18T10:50:00.003-04:00

Lately Ben has been realllllllly into hamburgers.

Not that he hasn't always been a fan, but the last few months have been especially hamburger filled!

First he read an article about the best $5 burgers in NYC and dragged me all around to try them all out. I think I made it to 3/5 places--one of which was in Queens!

Yes, we traveled around 45 minutes to try an under $5 hamburger! It was tasty, but that's a long way to go for a sandwich.

After finishing off the $5 list, he started finding other lists of the "best" hamburgers in New York.
So far not a one has trumped his favorite (Zaitzeff).

To be perfectly honest, most of them taste the same to me. I did notice that the bun was too thick at one restaurant, and that I liked the sweet potato french fries more at another..but otherwise?
Eh. A hamburger is just still a hamburger to me!

After traipsing all over the city and paying other people to make him hamburgers that never lived up to his favorite, I decided it might be fun to have make-your-own gourmet burger night!

So a few weeks ago, we made these little beauties:

(Ingredients include: chopped onion, parsely, garlic power, and mustard seeds. The mustard seeds were KEY!)

The burgers were a little too round and the buns could have been better, but overall it was a pretty successful experiment! I would show you pictures of the finished product, but the only semi-decent photo I could get occurred after Ben had already taken a big bite. Not sure anyone wants to see partially eaten hamburger!

We watched Hubert Keller's video a few times for cooking tips and then went to town searing and then devouring our creations.

I think I'll upgrade our bun choices next time and spend a little more time learning the art of a flat hamburger, but perhaps the strike will only extend to restaurant made food!

Merging my work life & life work

2010-09-17T10:04:00.000-04:00

A few weeks ago a friend at work helped me re-vamp my cover letter and resume (thanks K!).

Although I really like all of my current jobs, it's still my hope to eventually move into something a little more structured.

Working for 3 different non-profits in some type of part-time or freelance capacity is really interesting, but I (think) at some point I'll be ready to rejoin the daily grind! Not that working from home several days a week isn't really fun..but I think I just might be a little too type A to enjoy the flexibility.

Pretty sad, right?
I have a flexible work schedule and can do much of my work in my PJs and I really just want to be an in office!

Anyway, although I've clearly had a bit of success finding these small projects that I can string together I've had far less success with full-time offers. Or I suppose I could have been offered them and declined..perhaps that should be my blog 'party line' from now on!

I decided that despite several edits and help from others, it was time to really overhaul the documents that are supposed to represent me to potential employers. Work friend K is just a few years older, but has had really phenomenal success transitioning into new positions both here in NY and back in her hometown. I casually broached the topic, and she was kind enough to offer to help!

One thing that really struck me in the new cover letter she helped me conceptualize and write, was the idea of merging my work life with my life work (hence the title of the post). I made a conscious decision a few months ago to only pursue jobs that I find genuinely interesting.

I know that I am in an incredibly lucky position thanks to (a little) my part-time work and (a lot) to Ben's support, because this type of 'choosiness' is an incredible luxury. But K's thoughts about expressing this in my cover letter were right on point--I've been (slightly desperately at times) looking to find a position that meets these needs. Despite the low pay associated with both non-profit and gov't public health work, I'm really committed to doing work that represents my own passions and social justice interests.

Now I just need someone to pay me to hang out in the office all day..
And by hang out I clearly mean "work very hard" because hey..I am pretty type A!

A little NYC love a.ka. the day I saw the Batmobile!

2010-09-16T10:04:00.000-04:00

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Sometimes this city can be really overwhelming..even for those of us who have eschewed living on the island!

But sometimes it's just a darn fun and/or funny place to live.

Good example?
This past week, my entire office heard that they were filming the new Batman movie right outside. A bunch of adult women, who spend their day working to end sexual violence all got really excited and giggly and ran downstairs en-mass to see the BATMOBILE!

That's right, we all ran outside to take pictures of a car from a superhero movie franchise.
Which is pretty funny, especially since it seems like they're filming something around us every 10 seconds. Usually it's fun to look for a second and then move on, but for some reason we all really wanted to hang out and see the batmobile in action!

Oh New York.

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ps. We later learned that it was indeed the Batmobile..but they were NOT filming Batman. Apparently it's a remake of Arthur, and as part of the movie plot the guy rents the actual car used and then crashes it. I guess that's why the front was all crumpled and it was sitting on a tow truck!

1 year pre-wedding anniversary celebration

2010-09-13T10:44:00.000-04:00

B and I decided to spend Sept 4 (our wedding date NEXT year!) celebrating our future anniversary date. We spent the day calling it the P.W. celebration, but when we told some other people the story they told it should be called our "reversesary" so we are henceforth calling it by that name.

Anyway, we thought it might be fun to check out the new Italian-style market/restaurant/food hall: Eataly.

Despite the super punny name, it's a neat concept: it's like a market, travel agency, food hall, and Italian culture center all rolled into one.

We didn't realize that were were going just a few days after it opened, and on a day when Mario Batali (one of the Eataly creators) would be showing up to shmooze and take pictures. So we had to wait in line just go get in to the actual complex!

We wandered around for a bit despite the massive crowds, and then started to eat our way through the food stalls! We didn't end up sitting down at any of the 7 or 8 (?) restaurants scattered throughout the building, but we did try plenty of other things--including some delicious cheese and a lovely glass of prosecco!

I think B's favorite might have been the pear and vanilla gelato, although I don't know if he was more or less to excited to try it after Chef Batali hopped behind the counter to grab himself a few scoops. Although the people around us were certainly excited!

Not too bad for a bit of Italy in NY! Although, we'll have the chance to compare the real thing as we head of to visit B's Italian "mom" in a few weeks!

Oh, yeah..I also went to Mexico this summer!

2010-09-08T10:00:00.000-04:00

I've been so remiss in my blogging this summer that it somehow never came up that I spent a week in Mexico with some of my friends!

I won't bore you with too many details, so here's the quick overview:

1. Mexico was awesome! We stayed in a super swanky resort courtesy of a friend's family and spent a ton of time sitting around in the sun reading. Reading + beach walks= awesome!

2. A few of us toured Chichen Itza.
See:

It was really interesting, but I with they had let us climb up or in some of the monuments. Apparently they used to let you climb the ruins, but people used to deface or chip away pieces of stone and now it is off limits. We were all really disappointed, but it was still a great morning! We also got to swim in a sink hole a few miles away which was a tiny bit scary, but also very cool.

3. They let me drive a speedboat! Into open-ish ocean! It was mildly terrifying, but very fun. Then we got to snorkel. That was also kind of scary given my love of animal attack/disaster movies, but I made it through with only a few squeaks of terror.

4. The seafood. Enough said. Or not.. SO DELICIOUS.

Cooking club: fried green tomatoes

2010-09-06T10:00:00.000-04:00

Despite being a big fan of the movie, I've never tried to make fried green tomatoes.

Thank goodness for Wednesday night cooking club!

I don't know if I would have done this on my own, but with some adventurous food buddies by my side, it was pretty darn easy. Mostly because I got to: slice tomatoes, stir polenta, and then eat. Pretty good deal!

Ended up with fried green tomatoes, cheesy polenta, green beans, and delicious little fried green tomatoes.

We started out with these:

And ended up with these:

I don't know why I didn't take a picture of the finished plate, because it was pretty cute.
But it all tasted great, and that's all that matters!

Wedding update: The S & B extravaganza is slowly taking shape!

2010-09-04T10:00:00.000-04:00

Despite being really ill this past week (thanks ER for the misdiagnosis and medication that made me sicker!) I'm still in the midst of wedding planning.

So far we have:
1. Wedding colors
2. A venue in PA
3. A few possible caterers
4. A verrrry long list of people we would like to invite

and that's it!

I've also been to one bridal store with friends, one friend who makes dresses, and one custom-made dress store.

Still need to figure out the food, the photography and pretty much every other detail..but at least we have a bit of a plan!

Oh, and a secret wedding website.
We also have that.

The no-sugar diet recap

2010-09-03T14:00:00.001-04:00

Well, not sure that the no sugar diet I tried worked very well.

But that might have something to do with the fact that I'm a big idiot.
It's especially shameful as I'm the recipient of a science degree.
You'd think I would be able to craft an experiment that would actually work!

So I went off sugar for a few weeks.
My doctor said it might help my psoriasis clear up partially/fully and I thought it was worth a shot.
I use some pretty heavy duty topical medications and I would love to stop using some or all of them at some point.

Anyway, I tried to cut out all refined sugar.
I did see some improvement in my psoriasis.
I was feeling both mildly pleased by the success and really grumpy from the sugar withdrawal when I realized that I never stopped using my medication.
In fact, I was probably extra vigilant because I was thinking about it more.

So not a very good experiment!
There's no way to know if the extra vigilance helped clear things up, or if it was the lack of refined sugar.

Perhaps I'll try it again in a few weeks for real!

And I'm back..on the sugar, on the job hunt (ish), and on blogger!

2010-09-02T22:57:00.000-04:00

Well then. Seems like I took yet another semi-accidental hiatus from blogging.

Turns out this summer was not quite as relaxed as planned.

I thought I would enjoy my part-time jobs, figure out the full-time situation and bounce around the city a bit having fun.

Well, my main full-time job went into crisis mode due to a change in funding.
After 10 years the city council decided on (what seems like) a whim, to reduce the organization's funding from $295,000 a year to $5000.

Cue all hopes and dreams of transitioning into full-time totally imploding.
Or is it exploding?

Either way, I was sad, the organization went into panic mode and I spent a lot of time making semi-panicked calls trying to raise money.

It's been both frustrating and exciting; frustrating to learn how little our city officials know about the organizations that serve city residents and exciting as we kind of chart a new path forward as a group.

Anyway, it made for a lot less free time and fun than I was expecting!

More life, wedding, job etc. updates to come!

Sugar Free?

2010-07-12T12:13:00.000-04:00

When most people move to a new city, they find a hair stylist, a doctor and maybe a dentist in that order.

I start with the dermatologist (thanks psoriasis)!

Well, thanks to my dermatologist I spent 2+ weeks trying to eliminate all refined sugar from my diet.

Apparently some people think that since psoriasis is auto-immune, diet can have a huge impact on the symptoms. In my case, I do think that it gets worse when I overindulge in certain food/drink items.

In general, I’ve also been a little concerned about the long-term impact of slathering on a variety of pretty strong topical creams.

So I decided to try going sugar free for a few weeks.

It was a very grumpy 2 and half weeks, that culminated in my eating a large piece of (delicious) wedding cake and drinking some champagne.

At first I thought that there was some change.

Then I realized that I was still using the mildest topical cream.

For someone with a science-ish degree, I clearly did not take a very scientific approach to this little experiment.

So basically, I avoided all sorts of foods..grumbled, made B nuts..and then had NO way to determine if the diet did anything useful for my psoriasis.

Perhaps I’ll try again and also go cold-turkey from the meds..but for now, I’m back on the good stuff.

Kind of.

One thing I did realize is that there is refined sugar in EVERYTHING.

It’s actually scary.

Even pita chips have refined sugar. WHY do pita chips need sugar?

The answer is, they don’t!

So although I’m going to start eating some sweet things again when I need a treat, I am going to try and avoid refined sugar in every day items. It’s OK if I eat sugar when I eat a piece of cake. Cake should have sugar.

But pita chips? Bread? Jam? Why do these things need refined sugar, and often lots of it?

No more no-sugar, but definitely less.

DM Throwback post: 12 Days of Terror

2010-07-09T12:03:00.001-04:00

Just finished watching 12 Days of Terror.

B and I have been TEARING through The Wire, so I haven't been watching too many disaster movies. Or any movies for that matter.

But B had to work late last night, and I had a ton of cooking to do..so in went my little guilty pleasure in the background.

I must say, I do enjoy a good shark movie.
Even though this was actually a docudrama, there was some pretty good carnage.

My one complaint? The movie follows the shark attacks from 1916 pretty closely...so one of the victims is a little boy. I hate when they kill kids! Movie sharks are ONLY supposed to eat unsuspecting co-eds, foul-mouthed bad guys and the occasional hapless bystander who is 18+.

Actually, I have two complaints.
The women in 1916 -- or at least the movie version of 1916-- were totally useless.

Lots of crying and screaming, but that's about it.
I prefer crying, screaming and shooting at the shark thank you very much.

Quick Job & Life Update

2010-07-08T12:03:00.000-04:00

It’s kind of funny, but lately life has gotten in the way of blogging.

I guess it would be pretty sad if it were the other way around, but I do miss sharing updates with all 2 of you who read this regularly!

So here’s a quick update:

First bridal party outing= HUGE SUCCESS! I was a bridesmaid in a wedding last weekend, and I could not have had a better time celebrating with A & M. I’ve known A since freshman year of college, and it was pretty amazing to see her so happy. Mazel tov again!
Freelance gigs 1 and 2 have been moving along nicely. Almost done with a big project for freelance gig #2 and will hopefully have more work coming my way once I return from vacation in mid July.
In-office job is insanely busy. The non-profit just found that the NYC City Council eliminated all funding for sexual violence, and we’re now facing a budgetary shortfall of around $275,000. Incredibly frustrating/scary to see how little my own legislators value the work we do. The ONLY positive to this entire work-place crisis is that I’ve been honing my development & communications skills.

Helped coordinate an emergency phone appeal: CHECK
Created a new section of the website: CHECK
Sending email blasts to donors: CHECK

Received degree in the mail. Finally!
Received business cards in the mail. Finally!

Update over. Must finish work, pack and then head off to a week-long vacation with friends!

Birthday celebrations galore!

2010-06-06T12:16:00.005-04:00

This past weekend was PACKED!

Birthday dinner Friday night @ Jadis followed by hang out time and then a girls-only sleepover.
Birthday dinner Saturday night @ Wildood BBQ, followed by party @ PS450 bar.

Restaurant reviews to come (via yelp), which I'll also re-post here.

Overall, a busy and pretty fabulous weekend!

Also, a belated blogging happy birthday to A. & A.S.!

Hello more freelance work..

2010-06-05T12:12:00.000-04:00

Not sure how this happened, but I now have another freelance position.

Actually, I know exactly how this happened (thanks Sam N.!)...but I am a little perplexed about my mixed job-hunting results.

So far it seems like I can pick up part-time work and freelance gigs.
The full-time job with benefits, however, remains elusive.

So how much of this has to do with the economy? And how much has to do with my resume/qualifications/job hunting strategy?

Do I need to do something differently?
Or is this simply the reality of the current climate?

What I'm reading now..

2010-06-02T10:00:00.000-04:00

Despite the brand-new and very beautiful Kindle (still excited--!!!)...I just finished the paper version of Blindness and am in the midst of reading The New Jewish Wedding (NJW).

I picked up Blindness @ a stoop sale a few weekends ago for $.50 and received the NJW as a present from a friend.

Although I usually read really quickly, I found myself moving through Blindness pretty slowly. Sarramago doesn't use any quotation marks to differentiate between dialogue and description, and I found myself re-reading big chunks of the book to make sure I didn't miss anything.

Despite the slow going, I thought it was incredibly fascinating.
And upsetting.
But I guess fascinating + upsetting = well deserved nobel prize for literature.

I also watched the movie on Netflix over the weekend and found it underwhelming.

It just does not compare to the book in any way shape or form! I did find it interesting, however, that many blind and visually impaired advocacy groups tried to organize boycotts of the film. Apparently there was a lot of controversy because the people in the novel really regress in terms of behavior, compassion, decency etc. after they become blind. While I appreciate that people who are blind are often discriminated against at work etc., I do not think that the novel actually promotes the idea that visually impaired/blind people are either less capable or somehow more prone to immorality/violence etc. Rather, I thought that the book was trying to convey that all people are ill-equipped to respond to catastrophe and that there is something (possibly intrinsic?) to human nature that allows for domination and violence when the opportunity arises. I think the blindness in the book/film have very little to do with actually being blind--especially in the context of real life.

As for the NJW, I'm finding out all sorts of interesting things about the way Jews get married, and what bits of the ceremony and celebration are traditional vs. borrowed from non-Jewish culture vs. tradition only and not necessary.

Still a long way off from integrating any of this new knowledge into planning, but glad to be learning more about marriage from a Jewish perspective.

Re-post from the Alliance blog: Support the PA Coalition Against Rape

2010-06-01T13:03:00.000-04:00

I just posted this announcement/press release on the Alliance's official blog. I think it's a really important campaign, and a former PA resident I like the idea of supporting a great local organization.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Pennsylvania Coalition Against Rape is urging Pennsylvanians to contact WBEB 101.1FM in Philadelphia and express their displeasure with the station’s decision to deny PCAR radio advertising space for its HERO Project campaign.
The station denied PCAR space because the 30-second public service announcement, urging adults to report child sexual abuse, contained the words ‘rape’ and ‘sexual.’
WBEB’s General Manager Blaise Howard offered PCAR space only if it altered the wording to remove the word “rape” from the organization’s name and say “child abuse” instead of “child sexual abuse”, citing that the station’s listeners would be upset by the words that are currently used.
Howard stated to PCAR’s executive director that WBEB doesn’t take “explicit ads” because they are a “straight laced” company. However, the station does play sexually suggestive music by artists such as Prince, Madonna, Lady GaGa and George Michael.
“Child sexual abuse is not about sexuality.” PCAR Executive Director Delilah Rumburg said “It’s about violence to our children. If the station doesn’t believe its listeners could handle hearing words about abuse, imagine what child victims of sexual abuse are experiencing,”.
“We believe that our message is important to Pennsylvanians. All we are trying to do is get information out to the public that there is help and healing for survivors and their families. We don’t feel that modifying the language is an acceptable compromise. The station is asking us to censor information that could actually help their listeners. Their decision is appalling and perpetuates the veil of silence that continues to hurt victims in need of help.”
PCAR is urging residents to call the station at 610-667-8400 and voice their displeasure with the soft rock radio station and to ask the station to make a substantial donation to their local rape crisis centers.
To listen to the HERO Project public service announcements visit www.heroproject.org.

One last thing on the big birthday...

2010-05-26T11:00:00.000-04:00

A big thank you for all the facebook messages, text message, tweets and calls on the big day!

Also, Ben & co. produced some pretty fabulous gifts in honor of my birth & graduation:

From Ben:
A kindle!!

As I might have won a prize in 4th grade for reading the most books (thanks Mrs. Z for making me stand out as the COOLEST kid in the class..urg)..I think this might be the perfect present!

I've already downloaded a bunch of free books from Amazon and am excited that I won't have to lug actual books around on the subway anymore!

(also.. thanks to google images for this neat generic photo of a kindle..)

Ben also bought me a necklace made by our friend from accessories by ash ! It's nice having talented friends..

And can't forget my fabulous presents from Ben's Mom & Dad:

My shiny red Le Creuset pan!!

I only have one picture of my holding the pan & grinning like an idiot..which I refuse to post online! So instead, here is (yet another) generic google image.

My pan is actually a little more oblong, and has a cute matching lid..but you get the idea.

It's cherry red and sooo beautiful!

I told Ben that it's also a present for him..as he will now be the recipient of delicious baked pasta dishes and the like.

He was excited until he remembered that we don't have a dishwasher...we have him! Poor thing!

Since it was also my graduation this week, Ben's parents also sent me a really pretty glass earrings/necklace set. Or maybe the jewelry was for my birthday and the pan was for graduating?

Either way, this week has been a good one for presents!

Thanks!!!

Birthday roundup..

2010-05-26T10:59:00.000-04:00

Perhaps more introspective posts are still to come, but as of now, I'm feeling pretty happy about turning 25.

Some of it is that as I get older, the numbers themselves seem less scary.
When I was 14, 25 or 26 seemed really old.

I remember thinking that it was sad that my 8th grade Language Arts teacher was so desperate for a husband, especially since she was kind of old to still be single.

Of course, poor Ms. L.A.was probably only 27 or 28 at the time. Not exactly over the hill by any means.
And as I slowly inch closer to 27 or even 28, it just doesn't seem that old.

Also, it's pretty scary to think that at 14 I was convinced that all 20-something women were aggressively and anxiously searching for a man to marry.
While I think it was definitely true for Ms. L.A.--who by the way is now Mrs. L.A. courtesy of another teacher at the middle school--she could just have been searching for Ms. Right, or totally uninterested in a long-term relationship.

So now I've reached the quarter century mark, and I feel hopeful.
Still trying to figure out what to do about the job situation (more on that later), how to plan a wedding, and all sorts of other crazy things..but I'm pretty darn hopeful that everything will work out.

I also received some great birthday presents. So really, what's not to like about hitting the big 25?

Happy birthday to me...and my new toys!

2010-05-25T10:56:00.002-04:00

25 years old today..

Although my mother likes to remind me that I wasn't actually born until 2 pm..so I guess I'm celebrating a few hours early!

Pretty excited about my birthday/graduation party this weekend and some much-needed friend/family time.

Job hunting etiquette?

2010-05-20T13:20:00.001-04:00

I have come to a realization..I think I need a job-hunting guru. Or job fairy. Or something.

I think I'm doing a decent? decent-ish? good? job of staying positive and being proactive as I continue my hunt for a full-time position.

But sometimes I have questions or need advice, and I end up asking the same people over and over (sorry Ben!).

For example, is it bad form to apply for multiple positions at the same organization?
Does it make it better/worse if the applications are going to different divisions?

Do I seem unfocused if I do that?
Desperate for any job?
Or simply practical about my interest in a variety of opening?

See?
I need a job guru!

You know you've been reading too many bad thrillers when...

2010-05-20T08:44:00.002-04:00

...You see this job offer:

Chief Integration Officer
Millennium Promise
New York, New York

And think it says CHIEF INTERROGATION OFFICER.

Mini grapefruit & olive oil cupcakes with candied pistachios

2010-05-19T12:58:00.000-04:00

A few months ago I made a olive oil and blood orange cake for Ben's birthday.

It was super duper delicious and I've been meaning to make it again.

Unfortunately the blood orange growing season does not correspond with my wants and desires..and blood oranges are loooong gone in NYC!

So when a friend asked for some type of tasty citrus cake for her birthday, I decided to adapt the blood orange cake into some sort of grapefruit cupcake.

The original recipe (here) turned into this:

For the cake
2 medium (red) grapefruits
½ cup whole milk
½ cup extra virgin olive oil
2 large eggs
3/4 cup brown sugar

1/4 cup granulated sugar
1½ cups all-purpose flour
½ teaspoon baking soda
½ teaspoon baking powder
¼ teaspoon sea salt

For the topping (optional)
2/3 cup sugar
1/2 cup raw pistachios

Preheat oven to 325 degrees F. Grease muffin tin with olive oil, or set out clean silicone cupcake holders (which is what I used).

Once all the preheating and greasing is done, grate the 2 grapefruits to get zest. Put aside in a little cup or bowl. Then supreme the grapefruit over a large bowl. I let the actual pieces fall into the bowl and reserved most of the juice for further squeezing into a measuring cup. It was a little interesting (read: HARD) to supreme the grapefruits, but not impossible despite my relative inexperience. Once the fruit segments are in the bowl, measure the juice (you should have about 1/4 cup) and then add around a 1/2 cup of whole milk. Add the olive oil, eggs, and sugar to the juice/milk mixture and stir well to combine.

In a separate bowl combine the dry ingredients, and then mix in the wet ingredients, zest and grapefruit segments. Stir until batter is smooth.

Fill the muffin tin or baking cups around 1/2-3/4 full and pop them in the oven for 16-18 minutes. I know that my oven cooks a little unevenly and dries food out quickly, so you might have to tweak cooking times.

While the cupcakes are cooling, make the topping:

Put the sugar in a saucepan set over medium heat. Cook until the sugar is dissolved and has turned into a dark syrup. Make sure it doesn't burn or get too hot!

While you're creating your syrup, you can throw the pistachios into the microwave for about 45 seconds to get them a little toasty. Once they're toasted, toss them into the sugar syrup and mix them around.

Working really quickly, spoon a few pistachios and the now caramel-like sugar onto the top of each grapefruit cupcake. It will harden into a brittle like substance almost at once.

Once all of the cupcakes are covered, pop them into tupperware containers. If you let the cupcakes sit out for a bit (like overnight) the sugar will soften back into a syrup and will sink into the cupcakes keeping them nice and moist.

I wish I had better pictures..but here is what they looked like:

Weekend round up: Al Di La Brunch, marathon babysitting, & 4 mile walk to the street fair

2010-05-18T16:42:00.000-04:00

This weekend was packed!

Saturday morning I had a birthday lunch for a friend (happy belated birthday D) @ Al Di La.

I was really excited that D picked Al Di La to celebrate, because it’s been on my must-try list for ages.

Like since my second week in Brooklyn..!

It was worth the wait—although I do wish that I could have tried more things on the menu. Guess Ben and I will just have to save our pennies and come back for a full dinner. I had a (stop reading now mom & dad) delicious pork belly sandwich and a few bites of D’s pasta. Another friend, J, ordered some type of dandelion and white bean salad that also looked delicious. I didn’t get to try a bit though since he’s a vegetarian and I thought it would be bad form to eat some of his food and then have nothing to offer in return. A bottle of Prosecco shared between 7 people kept the lunch hopping along, and then a nice long walk to Blue Marble (cinnamon ice cream=amazing) finished off the rather decadent morning.

Then off to Park Slope to babysit for baby M. Luckily, Ben was able to join me at around 9 with offerings of Vietnamese food and The Wire. When baby M’s parents came home at around 1:30 Ben and I were so wired from staying up late that we ended up going back to our place for some reading.

I know, we’re so cool. We babysit together and then read late at night.

Sunday I made some tasty but kind of weird looking egg/chorizo/potato hash and then we walked over to 5^th avenue in Brooklyn for a street fair. It was a really far walk..and a really far walk back!

See!? :

Ok, so it doesn't look that far on the little map. But it was super hot out and I was in sandals!

After several hours made it home with only a few blisters, and then engaged in what can only be described as a baking frenzy.

Details on the frenzy to come..

Job Updates: Who Needs Just 1 Position Anyway?!

2010-05-15T16:42:00.000-04:00

I guess being a little type A has perks?

Ended my 2nd internship last Wednesday, and will arrive on Tuesday as the new part-time hire at the same organization.

Still looking for something full-time, but in the interim I have a paying part-time position @ a great non-profit, a freelance gig @ another great non-profit, and a paying position as baby M's babysitter (friend of a friend gig).

Feeling a little 'eh' about being a babysitter again, but I think it's mostly because it makes me feel a bit like I'm stuck in a high school/college flashback. I feel much less 'eh,' however, about having some money coming in from the work. Plus, baby M has big cheeks and is snuggly.

I'm still seriously underemployed, but I'm really grateful that I've been able to cobble together a few different things into some semblance of a work schedule.

Roethlisberger: Brain Damaged or Simply a "Boor"

2010-05-11T12:26:00.002-04:00

According to an article running on Sports Illustrated Online, Ben Roethlisberger-the quarterback for the Pittsburgh Steelers-may have brain damage.

While it seems pretty logical to conclude that a football player (lots of crashing to the ground) who was semi-recently involved in a serious motorcycle accident (more crashing to the ground) could indeed be suffering from brain damage, the article also posits that this actually provides a possible explanation for why Mr. Roethlisberger has been accused of rape twice in recent months.

Although not currently being treated for brain damage, a neuropsychologist at the National Institute of Neurological Disorders and Stroke is quoted as saying that someone with frontal lobe damage “might not read the intentions of a woman at a bar very well.. they might succumb to more primitive urges instead of saying, 'I shouldn't do this because it affects my career.'"

While the potential neuro-biological explanation for Ben Roethlisberger’s behavior is much more complicated (and described in more detail in the article), I was really struck by the doctor’s comment.

If Ben Roethlisberger does have brain damage, then he might not be able to accurately assess a situation.

That makes sense to me—and might have serious implications for any woman unlucky enough to find themselves in the vicinity of a large, often inebriated man with potential brain damage.

But what do primitive urges, or thoughts of career problems have to do with rape?

Men do not rape because they give in to primitive urges.

And men do not stop themselves from raping someone because they worry about how it might affect their career.

Men rape women because they think it’s OK to ignore the wishes and desires of a potential partner, or because they wish to exert power and control over a hapless or helpless victim. Or sometimes, because they’ve been taught that their physical needs are more important than anyone else’s.

Men do not rape because it’s a primitive urge.

People have sex because it’s a primitive urge. Sex and rape are not the same thing.

Ultimately, Ben Roethlisberger may have engaged in some sort of non-consensual sex because he lacked both the capacity to understand that his partner was unwilling and the ability to understand that he was unable to determine their interest.

But I think it’s dangerous to call these acts the result of the inability to control “primitive urges.” It’s demeaning towards men and dangerous for women.

What not to write to an-almost graduate...

2010-05-10T15:27:00.000-04:00

Or why I think it's really important to remember 2 things when sending emails to potentially over-caffeinated and definitely over-worked graduate students:

1. Do not give them additional things to worry about
2. Do not give them additional things to worry about

So, really it's just 1 simple rule.

If you need to email, call, or otherwise contact a graduate student who is literally days away from graduating please be CLEAR and upbeat unless there is actually a problem.

I received this email earlier:

Dear Saskia,

To oversee the MHS program and progress of each student, each term, the department reviews all MHS students transcripts. Please review your credentialing form which is attached. This is a great time to review your progress and meet with your adviser if there is any reason for concern. We encourage you to keep up the great work and come to us with any questions.

---------------------

I read this email and immediately began to worry.

Why did I need to review my credentialing form with graduation just a few days away?

Was something wrong?

Were they withholding my diploma?

Seems that nothing is wrong.

Grades are in, essay approved..graduation here I come.

So I clearly panicked and read too much into this email.

Which brings me back to my original point.

If you are sending out 14 emails, all of them addressed to seriously stressed students..would it kill you to write something upbeat? Something that clearly indicates that everything is on track, and that this just a final formality?

Is that too much to ask?!

I'm going to be a smarty pig!

2010-05-09T13:00:00.000-04:00

I don't blog about pf (personal finance) stuff here very often because I feel a little conflicted about sharing $ information in such a public forum.

Which is funny--since in person I'm more than happy to chat away about anything and everything to do with savings, loan, paychecks etc.

Maybe it's because I'm the product of 2 attorneys--but the idea of putting some things in writing just makes me uncomfortable. At least, if the writing can be traced back!

Anyway, I'm breaking my own unwritten (punny!) rule because..well..I'm excited!

Although I don't keep a pf blog, I do follow a few written by others.
One of the sites included a post very recently about Smarty Pig.

I thought it was a cute name, so I visited the site.
I now think both the name and icon are cute.
See:

I also think it's a great concept.

You create short-term saving goals and the site helps you determine how much you need to transfer each month into their (relatively) high yield savings plan to reach the total amount. You get to set the time limit and keep track of your progress.

You can also accept donations from friends/family/others using a variety of privacy setting (or just save on your own), and receive smarty pig cards as gifts.

When you've reached your goal you can have the $ transferred directly back to you bank account, or receive the amount as a gift certificate. If you choose the gift certificate option you get a bonus amount added too.

If you use smarty pig you clearly have to be really comfortable with online banking, and the idea of providing personal/financial information to secondary site.

Since I also use Mint.com I'm not that concerned, and they (seem) to have good security protocols in place.
I'm going to do a little more digging and then I'll probably set up an account.

Perhaps B and I could add Smarty Pig gift certificates to our registry..whenever we get around to making one of those!

Cutest cat picture(s) ever..

2010-05-04T13:14:00.000-04:00

No idea why we thought this was a good thing to do...but Bibi didn't seem to mind:

Also, can we talk about the fact that Layla and Bibi like to cuddle? They are SO CUTE! AHH!

Strategy Update: Informational Interviews

2010-05-03T13:18:00.000-04:00

A few weeks ago, a co-worker @ one of my internships reached out and offered to introduce me to some of their connections in the city.

I (very very gratefully) took this co-worker up on their offer and have thus far set up 2 informational interviews @ really interesting organizations that do advocacy work in the city.

I had my 1st informational interview last week and was able to learn a bit more about the NYC non-profit community. I also received some really helpful and concrete suggestions about cover letter writing and appealing to those who make hiring decisions. One of my goals for today is to use this new knowledge to improve the set of cover letters/resumes that I'll be sending out today.

I have my second informational interview on Friday and am hopeful for some more good advice.

I don't know if any of these meetings will actually help me find a job, but having some sort of strategy as I job hunt is making me feel a little more in control of the process.

I actually do think that these meetings will help--either directly through the networking or indirectly through the advice--but am really excited to have them even if they're just educational.

Done! Done! Done! Finished!

2010-04-26T18:47:00.003-04:00

My degree won't be in the mail until next month..but barring some weird catastrophic happenstance I am now the proud owner?receipient?something? of a Masters degree!

Enough said!

Big step: the bank accounts are now 1. Almost.

2010-04-25T18:47:00.006-04:00

Pretty crazy.
Ben and I now have a single account.

Kind of.

After several weeks of annoying phone calls and filling out forms (sometimes several times), Ben and I now have a joint checking account.

When I sign online I can now see the joint account, my original checking account and my savings.

As soon as I have a second to breathe I'm going to call the bank and am going to merge my original checking into the joint account.

I have NO IDEA why they couldn't do this as part of the process we just went through..but oh well.

Either way, big step!!

Better late than never..? Indian Feast with some Brooklyn pals!

2010-04-24T18:44:00.008-04:00

Yikes, you'd think something major was going on in my life or something--like presenting my final essay and getting my masters--what with my lack of blogging.

Oh, wait..that is happening...THE DAY AFTER TOMORROW!

I'll back back after I present with some post-graduate degree thoughts.
But for now, a cooking post!

The informal cooking club that I tried to start up last fall has slowly morphed into an informal dinner party group.

This past week it turned into an Indian-themed Shabbat dinner.
I'll have to check in with J (the host) of this particular shindig, because I should really link to the site that had all the recipes.

Since I can't remember it offhand, I'll just share some pictures.

As I (hope) you can see..it was delicious!

DM throwback post: Day of the Triffids Mini Series?

2010-04-20T18:38:00.000-04:00

I have a weird habit--I search imdb for former A/B list actors and then see if they have made any movies that I might enjoy.

Why former A/B listers only?
Becasue they make all of the 'good' made for TV disaster movies of course!
Nothing like a former A or B lister slumming it up in another snake/shark/catastrophe/tornado movie!

I was trying to look up a specicic original 90210 cast member earlier today, and couldnt' remember the right name. So I guessed, and ended up on the wrong page [note to self: do not confuse Jason Priestly with Luke Perry].

Well, it all turned out for the best!
Seems Mr. Priestly was recently involved in a remake of The Day of the Triffids, which is one of my favorite creature feature mini-series.

I think that the new version is a BBC remake? But I can't find any release information.
I did find a link for the blu-ray edition (Day of the Triffids [Blu-ray])of the DVD, but it's not even available right now.

Guess I'll have to wait and see if it shows up in Netfix?

The Reading List Grows Longer

2010-04-20T11:04:00.000-04:00

With potential unemployment or underemployment looming, I've decided to create a reading list.

The library near us is pretty terrible, but it has free books and a way to order copies from other branches..so I think it will work out.

Here's what I have so far:

1. A Reliable Wife: I am actually already reading the book (thanks to Ben's aunt)
2. Inside the Outbreaks: The Elite Medical Detectives of the Epidemic Intelligence Service: Seems like a good way to use some of my hard-earned public health knowledge. Plus, I'm a sucker for anything with case studies and/or the word 'epidemic' in the title.
3. Sustainably Delicious: Making the World a Better Place, One Recipe at a Time: I like cookbooks, and sustainable food. Seems on point.
4.Little Bee: A Novel: a co-worker @ the non-profit suggested that I add this to the list. She said it's really really good. Good enough for me!

Writing sample resquest: a.k.a. my first tiny kernal of hope in the job hunt process

2010-04-19T10:00:00.002-04:00

A little bit of progress!

I received this email over the weekend:

Dear Saskia,

We recently received your resume for the (title removed by me!) and would like to see some of your writing samples before offering you an interview. While this may sound like an odd request, we’ve received several excellent applications and are hoping to get a better idea of each candidate’s writing abilities before offering interviews.

Ideally, we’re looking for one advocacy/policy brief and one annotated bibliography/literature review. The most related to family planning/reproductive health the better.

We are planning on holding interviews during the week of April 26^th. Please let me know if you would be able to provide these samples by COB next Wednesday and we will be in touch as soon as possible afterwards.

The only thing is, this is actually for an internship and not a full time job.

I applied for the position anyway because:

1. It's a full-time position for the summer

2. They are offering a great hourly rate

3. It's in the family planning unit of the organization (hellloo using my P.H. degree!)

4. The organization is great, and I would love to work there for real.

I figure that an internship might be a great way to get a foot in the door.

And even if they don't have full-time positions avaialbe at the end of the summer, it will give me 3 more months of employment and experience.

I can keep job hunting during that time, and I'll get paid every week.

In all honesty, I'm a little freaked out--it seems crazy that there is this much competition for an internship but really hopeful that this or something else will work out.
And if nothing else, it's a much better email than the other one I received last week!

Fingers crossed..

Weekend report: Brooklyn flea

2010-04-18T12:36:00.000-04:00

Came home from the flea yesterday with 2 things: cupcakes from raspberry bakeshop (the brainchild of Roopa from raspberry eggplant) and a banged up window with intact hinges.

The funny thing is, the window was the impulse buy of the day! I knew that there would be cupcakes at the flea yesterday, and I've been wanting to try Roopa's creations for a while. I've been reading her blog for ages (a year? two?) and love using her recipes. When she started a small specialty cupcake service, I figured it was my duty to check it out. Especially with wedding stuff on the (far far away) horizon!

As for the window, I couldn't resist. Oh, and the guy let me bargain for the price based upon the amount of money I had in my purse and the my need for cupcakes. A very understanding flea seller.

Here's my window:

You can already see the blue tape on the glass because I'm in the process of refinishing and priming the entire piece.

I think I'm then going to paint it a really cheery color.
Then?

I think I'm going to wall mount it and call it art.

I'll post more pictures as I get farther along in the process. I'm not entirely sure if this is going to work, so I guess we'll see what happens.

I almost bought 2 huge windows with shutters but realized:
a. too tiny to carry that stuff my byself
b. what would I do with 2 huge windows with shutters?

New Abortion Law in Nebraska

2010-04-14T14:33:00.000-04:00

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I'm curious to see how a new bill in Nebraska plays out--particularly how they choose to challenge the legality of the measure.

I'm sure that someone (ACLU, PP,etc) will challenge the new law, the question is really about tactics.

While I do NOT support this bill, I think that it represents a shift in thinking on the part of anti-choice advocates. Usually anti-choice legislation tries to shame women into continuing the pregnancy or make it financially impossible (forced waiting periods, ultrasound requirements etc). The idea behind most of these measures is that women don't know what's best, and it's up to the paternalistic government to save them from making a decision they might later regret.

The new bill, however, would "[ban] most abortions 20 weeks after conception or later on the theory that a fetus, by that stage in pregnancy, has the capacity to feel pain."

I have 2 (main) problems with this law:

1. I do not believe that the government has to the right determine if and when a woman can have an abortion. So I can't think of very few situations in which I would support a measure that limits choice. My particular problem with this particular bill, however, has to do with:

2. Science! I think that this law relies upon faulty science, and is a rather transparent attempt to (yet again) to curtail reproductive choice using pseudo scientific claims. As a public health student in the Population, Family and Reproductive Health dept. @ a great school, I've learned that we are still learning about fetal development..but what we do know now, does not support the claim that a fetus can feel pain.

For example: Researchers at the University of California, San Francisco, wrote in the Journal of the American Medical Association that babies born before 30 weeks’ gestation lack “functional pain perception.” That’s one indicator, they suggested, that “fetal perception of pain is unlikely before the third trimester.”
According to another researcher: "The brain circuitry for processing pain seems to be complete by 26 weeks’ gestation, he wrote. But true pain requires not only development of the brain but also development of the mind to accommodate the subjectivity of pain."

While one or two studies can not provide definitive proof either way, I think that the Nebraska bill is disregarding clear evidence that contradicts their basic premise.

Also, both of my concerns about this law totally disregard an important aspect of reproductive health decisions in this country--we currently make it very difficult for women to make family planning decisions. If we were to provide better information, and easier/cheaper access to contraceptive methods then abortions would not be needed as often.

Even in the current climate, most abortions occur before 20 weeks gestation and those that do occur in the later time period often happen in the context of a fetal anomaly or complication. In some ways this measure just adds a painful and unnecessary burden to women and families who have to terminate a pregnancy due to a serious problem. This bill will only cause pain to women who may already feel deeply tortured by a painful but necessary decision.

Making Rejection Sting a Little Less

2010-04-13T15:47:00.000-04:00

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I recently sent out a resume and cover letter indicating my interest in an open position at a foundation located in NYC.

I sent out the email at 11:32 am and received the following message at 11:46 am:

Dear Saskia,

Thank you very much for your interest in the role of ___(position) at the ___(organization). Although you do have an impressive background, we have decided to focus on applicants who are more closely aligned with our ideal profile as outlined in the position description.

I'm sorry that we won't be able to consider you for this role, but I will keep your resume in our active file in case I come across other opportunities that might be of interest to you.

Sincerely,

X

Based on the job description, I thought I was rather closely aligned with the ideal profile.

I’m more interested, however, in figuring out how the recruiter (X) came to their conclusion.

How exactly do you read a cover letter, examine a resume and craft a response in a little less than 15 minutes?
It’s possible that their ideal profile was simply not clearly explained in the job posting and I was missing an important skill that immediately removed me from consideration. Although there was no length of work experience listed, maybe they immediately nixed anyone will less than 5 years in the field.

Or maybe they sent rejection letters to anyone whose name started with the letter ‘S.’

No way to know really.

Luckily, the quick turnaround actually made me feel less upset about the rejection.

Since the recruiter clearly didn’t take the time to learn anything about me, I’m going to assume that I do indeed have an ‘impressive background’ and that the refusal is their loss.

The long-promised ring photos

2010-04-11T16:32:00.002-04:00

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Sorry everyone (and by everyone, I mean my mother and father) about the delay in the ring photos.

B & K took some pictures during our Chicago trip, and I snapped a few with my puny camera.

So here..they are:

The plain white gold band is Ben's engagement ring, and mine is the one with the diamond.

Also, not sure why it looks like stones are missing on the top, but it's just a trick of the light.

Ben will wear his while we're engaged and then probably just keep it as his wedding band. I'll have to go back to the same jeweler who made mine so that he can create a band that works with my ring (oh the horror!).

So far Ben's gotten a few comments about his engagement ring, which makes me feel happy about the decision for us both to wear something.

We don't have to worry about the diamond as it was already in circulation, and having Ben wear a ring too means it's a mutual commitment symbol rather than a "my man bought me" thing. At least, that's the idea! Doesn't hurt that I also rather enjoy sparkly jewelry..

Next up on my newly created reading list: Inside the Outbreaks

2010-04-10T14:00:00.001-04:00

With potential unemployment or underemployment looming, I've decided to create a reading list.

The library near us is pretty terrible, but it has free books and a way to order copies from other branches..so I think it will work out.

Here's what I have so far:

1. A Reliable Wife: I am actually already reading the book (thanks to Ben's aunt)

2. Inside the Outbreaks: The Elite Medical Detectives of the Epidemic Intelligence Service: Seems like a good way to use some of my hard-earned public health knowledge. Plus, I'm a sucker for anything with case studies and/or the word 'epidemic' in the title.

3. Sustainably Delicious: Making the World a Better Place, One Recipe at a Time: I like cookbooks, and sustainable food. Seems on point.

And then..?

Suggestions?

Chicago trip and the largest piece of carrot cake I've ever seen

2010-04-09T13:44:00.002-04:00

So as you know, Ben and I recently took a trip to Chicago.

We went to second city to see a show, hung out with B & K (the parents of Ben's goddaughter), and generally acted like tourists.

I didn't take too many pictures, partially because my camera is getting old and a little grumpy.
I know that K took some great ones though, so perhaps I'll post those at some point.

This picture, however, just HAD to go up right now:

That's B next to the LARGEST PIECE OF CARROT CAKE I'VE EVER SEEN.

It was absurd. And free.
So we ate as much as we could, and then we packed it into boxes and brought it back to our hotel.

I think we all felt a little guilty about ordering such a monstrosity, but we had no idea what we were getting when we asked to redeem our coupon (provided by the hotel) for a free dessert.

And people wonder why America has such a reputation for excess...

MHS Essay

2010-04-08T13:27:00.000-04:00

A few people have asked (via email) about my MHS essay.

In case you're curious, I wrote about the need for better sexual assault data in NYC. We need better data so that we can evaluate prevention programs. Without a baseline, it's very difficult to determine if a program has been effective.

Wanna read the first few paragraphs?
Either way, they're included below.
Figure I should get a little extra mileage out of all that work (you know, in addition to my masters degree).

STATEMENT OF THE PROBLEM

There is little debate that sexual violence is a serious problem that dramatically impacts the lives of many women, men, and children each year in the United States. Numerous studies have shown that survivors of sexual violence suffer from a plethora of problems, including physical injuries, mental health issues, substance abuse, and financial strain (Choudhary, 2008; Conoscenti, 2005; Kaukinen, 2005). Recognizing the impact sexual violence can have upon both individuals and communities, the feminist movement has been working since the early 1970s to “reform [the] criminal codes defining the crimes of sexual assault and other crimes against women” and to establish a system of community-based services for victims (Kilpatrick, 2004).

Although the advocacy and direct service organizations that arose from this movement have done much to address the long-term needs of survivors, efforts to impact sexual violence on a primary prevention level have been hampered by lack of coordination and a serious dearth of relevant community-level data.Without relevant baseline data, large-scale prevention programs cannot be adequately evaluated.uch evaluation is a key component of any new program and is necessary in order to determine a program’s effectiveness, success, and possible scale up/replicability. Thus, as primary prevention remains the ultimate goal of sexual violence advocates, lack of relevant data presents a serious problem................

MHS here I come..!

2010-04-07T17:00:00.000-04:00

I handed in my final essay this past Monday.
Assuming that the review committee likes my final MHS essay and that I don't totally freak out during my 10 minute powerpoint presentation, I'm all done.

I have an end-date for my DOHMH/DOE internship, and will be figuring out my Alliance final day when my supervisor returns from vacation.

It seems crazy that this time last year I was interviewing for internships and trying to figure out how Ben, Layla and I were all going to fit in the 250 square feet of fun he called an apartment.

Now we have 2 kitties, 2 bedrooms and I have 2 internships and a freelance position with a non-profit.
Thanks to some help I'm the in process of setting up informational interviews with organizations in NYC and I'm trying to figure out my next steps.

Another thought on the job hunt..

2010-04-02T16:08:00.001-04:00

Lately I've been wondering if I should have done things differently.

Perhaps I should have worked longer before starting a graduate program?
Perhaps I should have tried to do a dual degree program?
Perhaps I should still try to add a clinical degree to my (almost) masters?

I'm trying not to second guess my self, because I think ultimately this will all work out. If I had remained in STL, Ben and I might have been forced to endure at least 2 years of long distance. Considering how much we hated just 1 year/4 hours apart I'm not sure either of us would have remained sane during 2 years and 16 hours apart.

Or, if I had moved back East without an acceptance letter to a program, I might still be unemployed.

Or I might have been laid off in the last round of financial meltdowns in the non-profit and gov't sectors and facing the same predicament (needing a job) without the benefit of health insurance cushion due to school and an additional degree.

Right now though, it's all a little uncertain and it seems like I'm either under or overqualified for every single position in NYC.

As of now my goal is to send out a resume/cover letter per week and see what happens. I'm also trying to attend more work events for the networking possibilities and volunteer at a community event in April.

If that doesn't work, I'm going to move on to informational interviews and see what happens.
I know, however, that I'm still in a really good position. I've only been applying to positions that really spark my interest, which is really a luxury of sorts. If I don't feel like that's working, I'll start to broaden my search.

In the interim, I'm shamelessly self-promoting every chance I get @ work and trying really hard to remain upbeat.

Next step for blogging might be to create a 'places I would LOVE' to work @ list and see who has connections/wants to help!!

A late birthday post: Ben's Birthday Cake!

2010-04-01T16:21:00.004-04:00

Ben's birthday was already quite a few weeks ago, and I'm just now getting around to posting about the celebration. Yikes!

Anyway, despite taking a rather low-key approach I wanted to share a few quick photos.

First up, the cake: Olive Oil and Blood Orange w/ Pistachio Brittle Topping

I adapted a recipe from raspberryeggplant and was (mostly) pleased with the result.
I made mine in this shallow dish; Ben made it for me and it seemed fitting, and Roopa's recipe said to put it in a loaf pan but I wanted mine to be more dessert-like.

It's a pretty terrible picture, but I think it tasted great.

I also made a little bit of the batter into cupcakes. That way I could try out the cake and topping before I handed it over to Ben! It would have been pretty sad if I gave him a cake I hadn't tried and it tasted awful.

You can (kind of) see in picture of the cupcake how everything turned out this rather neat shade of green:

I think it was a success, despite the fact that the topping was really really hard. I didn't get the sense from the original recipe that it was supposed to be a brittle, but that's how mine turned up..so I tweaked the name and decided to pretend it was on purpose.
I think that Ben had to shatter it with a knife before cutting slices @ his office party, but (he said) that it tasted delicious..so that's all that matters (right?!).

Welcome back to blogging (to me!)

2010-04-01T15:53:00.003-04:00

I'm not sure how/why this happened, but I took a hiatus from blogging during the month of March.

Which is weird, because a lot has happened over the past few weeks.

Got engaged and got ring #1.
Visited with my family in NYC and had sibling day on a lovely Sunday.
Wore ring #1 for 3 weeks while designing ring #2.
Got ring #2, and took it on a trip to Chicago to show it (and me) off at the seders.
Met Ben's uncles, aunts and cousins on his dad's side and spent some quality time with the future family members to be.
Hung out with the parents of Baby E in Chicago, and met one of Ben's oldest friends.

Got back from Chicago just in time to submit my graduate school thesis (due MONDAY), and start planning my presentation.
All while splitting my time between my 2 internships, doing consulting work for the 3rd organization, and trying not to lose my mind while job hunting.

Maybe I was just too busy to blog?

Go check out: "A Day in the life of..A Rape Crisis Advocate"

2010-03-03T15:33:00.002-05:00

I can't believe I haven't posted anything about this series yet!
Go check it out, it's great.

Although in all fairness, I'm a little biased since the project is kind of mine..

I'm not a rape crisis advocate, but several of my co-workers @ the NYC Alliance Against Sexual Assault are either currently volunteering in one of these programs or past participants. We thought it would be a really need opportunity for advocates from around the city to share their experiences.

So we sent out a few requests and then picked 6 advocates.
The Alliance blog is featuring their posts--1 advocate a week for 6 weeks.
It's also a contest, and the 2 advocates whose posts garner the most comments will win prizes.

The posts are really really interesting, as are the comments left by family, friends and blog readers.

People have been coming forward to share personal stories, or simply share how much they appreciate the work of these women (I'm sure there are also male advocates..ours just happen to be female).

Go visit!

Throwback Disaster Musings post: VIPERS!

2010-03-01T11:04:00.009-05:00

Tara Reid might just be my new favorite actress, if only because she seems totally willing to keep a straight face and give it her all in a movie like Vipers.

Although, I'm not sure 'actress' is the right word. Perhaps we need a new name for this type of endeavor. Actually, I think that all SciFi (or is it now ScyFy? Or ScyFi?) stock cast members should fall into a special category. They're not quite ready to throw in the towel and head over to a soap opera, but they appreciate the paycheck and screen time of a made-for-tv SciFi movie enough that they will participate in such cinematic gems as : Vipers, Supergator, and the upcoming Sharktopus.

Anyway, back to Tara Reid and co in Vipers..where a small town on a

rural west coast island (I’m assuming off the coast of Oregon or perhaps Washington State) is overrun with genetically enhanced vipers.

If you ignore the plot holes the size of Texas—which shouldn’t be hard given the fact that you’ve already committed to spending 2 hours of your life watching a movie called Vipers—this was actually one of the better creature features I’ve seen in recent years.

This does not mean that Vipers is actually good, just better than some of the others I’ve seen recently.

I think this has something to do with the fact that CGI snakes do not look nearly as fake as some others, especially when they are small. There have been plenty of snake movies made in the past few years and I think they’ve kind of gotten the hang of making the gross little hissing things look OK.

The movie was also really smart about the actual attacks. Although there was plenty of fake blood spraying around, we didn’t have to suffer through any weird slow-motion close ups of teeth chomping on still writhing and screaming victims (more on this later..thanks to my 2 hours of time spent with Supergator).

Tara Reid manages to be both slightly nauseating in her emotional scenes and nominally credible in her action 'lets kill the snake scenes'. I think she missed her calling with all of those American Pie movies! She's actually pretty fierce when she's trying to protect all of her people from creepy crawlers.

Overall, I appreciated that:

1. Not every female character was a complete ninny

2. Had a few B/C list actors slumming it up in a made for tv snake movie

3. The rules were followed: sex=death, adultery=death, and being a child=safe!

and

4. Despite this being a creature feature at least 1 character died in a totally bizarre and non-snake related manner.

While this is clearly a B-horror movie due to campiness, slumming actors and its made-for-tv status..I'm actually a fan! Go Vipers!

ps. Also loving the fact that random Buffy characters are starting to pop up in these movies..woohoo!

Some ring decision making coming up this weekend!

2010-02-26T23:31:00.006-05:00

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When Ben proposed a few weeks ago he gave me a really beautiful ring from my favorite jewelry store in Brooklyn. I would provide a link, but they don't have a website!

I was a little surprised when I found out--but it makes sense as they only carry vintage and one of a kind pieces. Once something is sold, it's gone for good. I guess it would be really hard to keep a website up to date with such a unique inventory.

Anyway, my current ring looks something like this:

I say current, because my parents are coming in this Sunday with a diamond that once belonged to my great-grandmother. The stone is currently set in a necklace, and we are going to visit the owner of Elleven to discuss the possibility of resetting and designing around the family stone.

Ben knew about the other diamond when he purchased this ring, and they agreed that I could wear it for up to a month while we made a decision about using the other stone.

At this point I'm pretty sure that we're going to design--it makes sense to use a diamond that is already in circulation (thus avoiding blood diamond concerns), plus the family connection. I also took jewelry classes for many years and still do some metalworking as a hobby. It seems kind of fitting to have a hand in my own ring design!

It'll be a little sad to give back the ring Ben actually proposed with, but hopefully I'll get to wear it until the final ring is actually ready!

Usually scared of zombie/horror movies..but what an interesting idea behind "The Crazies!"

2010-02-24T13:58:00.004-05:00

Usually I'm kind of a chicken when it comes to zombie/horror films.
I like the idea (death, doom, gloom) but not all of the brain eating and gore.
I did actually enjoy Zombieland quite a bit, but I still spent a good portion of the film making squeaking noises and trying not to hide.

Anyway, I didn't really have any intention of seeing "The Crazies" in theatres, despite the fact that it stars Timothy Olyphant and I feel a general need to support his work. Since I loved "Deadwood" and I now feel like I should try to ensure his success in other projects..I know, I'm a little nutty.

The previews made the movie look scary, and I like my movies to be heavy on the total annihilation of the plant/citizens and light on the technicolor blood.
Apparently though, there is a whole subtext to the movie that I had not considered.

According to a NYTimes article, this seemingly innocuous horror movie was chosen very carefully. The film is partially backed by Participant, a politically focused film company founded by the first president of eBay.

They seem to think that "The Crazies" provides a venue for political and social discourse--especially as the plot directly relates to issues of weapons security and the purity of water.

While it's not exactly unusual to find rather heavy-handed messages in disaster and/or horror movies (think The Day After tomorrow: ignore climate chance and DIE), I think it's interesting that the movie was produced almost entirely to address ecological and political issues. I guess this would be less surprising in a documentary, or even drama. But a full-tilt horror movie seems like a more original venue to preach this type of message.

Still not sure I'll see it in the theatres..but perhaps I'll now add it to my netflix Q.
Then I can make the screen extra tiny on my computer and hide when it gets gross!

Engagement dinner celebration..a trip back to Craft!!

2010-02-22T13:43:00.000-05:00

Holy cow (pun intended) is the food @ Craft delicious.
B took me here for a surprise engagement celebration dinner last week and we had a wonderful evening despite the snowy conditions and overall depressingly gross weather.
I know that Tom C. lost his Michelin star a few years ago, but thanks to a neat article in the New Yorker about their system, I’m going to assume that this has more to do with their stuffy emphasis on classic French cooking than the food at Craft.

B and I ate at Craft a year or so ago. During dinner we tried to remember the occasion. I thought perhaps it was for Valentine’s Day, he says it was for our anniversary. Either way, the last time we visited the restaurant we tried the tasting menu and left very happy, very full, and feeling a tiny bit poor.

This time around we had a gift certificate (thanks to B’s mom & dad!) and felt like it was the perfect occasion to go hog wild (yep, pun intended yet again).
We shared the field greens and an octopus appetizer. The field greens were very tasty, but the octopus was outstanding. Perfectly cooked—not chewy or gummy—but firm and tasty, with a great, slightly spicy sauce on the side that made dipping each piece fun. We fought over the last few bites it was so tasty!

Then on to the steak (B) and the veal cheeks (me). Normally I try to avoid veal because it seems kind of cruel, but Craft has information on their menus about getting all of their meat from local purveyors and farms. Since their meat is thus all locally produced, free-range, etc. I’m (hoping/assuming) that this extends to the treatment of the slightly younger cows that may have eventually ended up as part of my meal.

Humane treatment aside/assumed, the veal cheeks were amaaaazing. Tender and delicious and very filling despite a seemingly small portion. We also shared garlic risotto on the side and a dish of sautéed kale (or perhaps another green? can’t remember). Both the sides were very tasty, although I almost enjoyed the greens more than the risotto.

For dessert I tried a new tactic and ordered the brioche with crème fresh ice cream instead of something super sweet as per my usual tactic. B ordered his usual sorbet and some blood orange segments on the side. I think he almost enjoyed his little bowl of blood orange segments more than anything else—he’s funny like that. My brioche dish, which was similar to French toast but without an egg-y tasting batter was delicious. I slathered it with the slightly tangy ice cream and polished it all off very happily.

Overall, seemed like the perfect way to celebrate our engagement!

Big News..that (almost) everyone already knows!

2010-02-22T13:32:00.000-05:00

In order to save myself a little time and energy, I decided to share some big news here on my blog.

Just a week ago, B proposed!

He waited for the uber-romantic holiday of President's Day.. for which I am eternally grateful (I would have killed him if he'd asked on V-day. Blech).

Not much to the story as I spied the box and started to cry before he managed to actually say much, but so glad that it all happened in our apartment with the kitties nearby.

Now wearing a beautiful ring from my favorite jeweler in Cobble Hill, and going in this weekend to (potentially/probably) start the designing process. I'll have to hand this ring back in, but since I have my great-grandmother's diamond it seems a little silly not to design something totally unique.

NYTimes Reports: New York Senate Expels Monserrate Over Assault

2010-02-10T12:16:00.002-05:00

Although I'm still technically registred to vote in Baltimore (and have a license from MO), I've started to feel very invested in New York politics.

I'm sure that a lot of that has to do with the fact that I'm doing a lot of policy work @ one of my current internships..but no matter how it's happened, I'm invested!

Anyway, I saw an article this morning and felt like sharing.
Seems that NY State Senate (finally) decided to expel Senator Monserrate, a Queens Democrat from his seat.

Monserrate was "convicted last fall of a misdemeanor for dragging his companion down the hallway of his apartment building. "

Despite the somewhat bland langauge used in the article, most New Yorkers are aware that Monserrate was arrested after he dragged his (then?) girlfriend out of the apartment and down the hall by the hair and proceeded to generally abuse her in full view of secuirty cameras .

While I'm not sure that the Senate's vote is means much in terms of advancing the rights of women, or highlighting the plight of domestic violence survivors I'm glad that they are at least publicy decrying Monserrate's actions.

Sadly, it seems that Monserrate is still an arrogant, abusive jerk.
His reaction to the vote:

The actions that I’ve committed,” he said, “do not rise to the level of expulsion.”

Brooklyn's 81st Precinct probed by NYPD for fudging stats

2010-02-04T15:44:00.004-05:00

Very disheartening, but maybe not that surprising.

A police officer in Bed-Stuy (a Brooklyn neighborhood not too far from ours) recently reported his OWN PRECINCT to internal affairs for fudging crime reports.

Seems like the police officers in the 81st precinct are not that interested in taking reports for serious crimes--including robbery, rape and felony assault.

According to the officer who reported to internal affairs, there has always been some amount of report mishandling in the precinct but it became markedly worse when a new commanding officer, Mauriello, took charge in 2008.

Looking at the numbers provided by the precinct, you do have to wonder about the marked decreases in reported crimes.

There is always the possibility that the area has simply become safer..but I somehow doubt that's the case when during the same period the city was forced to cut funding and the NYPD lost several thousand officers to retirement, low recruiting etc. It just doesn't seem that fewer officers+ less money should = less crime.

This allegation seems to have some anecdotal support (the newspaper found several sources), as well as a general feeling from city residents that police officers definitely try to avoid taking reports for certain types of crimes (including rape).

Although I find this beyond frustrating, it does tie in slightly to my thesis.
So at least I can feel annoyed/slightly productive at the same time.

I feel like a parent..with no children in sight!

2010-02-02T16:01:00.000-05:00

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As I was sitting in the exam room of an office on Monday I realized I kind of felt like a parent.

I had sad little monkey with a sniffly nose and a fever sitting on my lap , and I could hear a little kid crying in the waiting room.

Of course the sad little monkey was our almost 3 year old cat, Layla, and not a baby..but I sure felt like a harried parent!

First Bibi (the new kitten) got sick------------>

She then ever-so-sweetly sneezed on Layla for two days, so of course Layla caught the cold.

I took Bibi to the vet on Friday, and then had to drag poor Layla to the same clinic the following Monday.

I spent most of the weekend wiping gross..stuff..off of their poor little noses and trying to avoid being sprayed in the face every time one of them sneezed.
I was not particularly successful and overall it was a rather yucky weekend!

Bibi seemed to bounce back almost immediately once she was on medication, but poor Layla stopped eating and became so placid it was creepy. She usually spends most of her time trying to scare me to death by popping out from under the bed, or randomly nosing her way into anything and everything (tv screen, laptop, any dish or cup left out).

She seems to be on the mend after a fluid injection, 2 shots, and twice daily meds..but goodness it's been nutty.

Hopefully she'll be in better spirits soon..and up to her usual tricks:

Apt Improvement Project 2: painted mirrors from Housing Works

2010-01-27T10:03:00.001-05:00

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I’m a big fan of thrift store/flea market furniture purchases..and New York is a great place to hunt around for fun used items.

I try to hit up the Brooklyn Flea every 6 weeks or so, and always pop in to the Housing Works store in Brooklyn Heights when I’m in that part of the neighborhood.

Last week I found these little mirrors at Housing Works. They were only $3/each, so I snagged the entire stack.

I figured that they would be a perfect project for the weekend, and for some of the leftover teal paint from the prep carts.

Here is an in-the-middle picture:

I added the teal paint, and then decided that it needed something more.

So I just added a medium that creates a crackle effect, and then dabbed on some silver metallic paint.

I think it looks really pretty! Picture of the finished item to come soon!

The Apartment Improvement Project Continues..

2010-01-26T15:43:00.000-05:00

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I really love our apartment. It’s nice sized (even by NYC standards), is in a great neighborhood, and is really close to several subway lines.

The only thing I do not like is the lack of decoration! We opted not to paint when we moved in, and the walls are all very white. We’re lucky that we have a really nice fireplace and mantel, but other than that portion of the living room the space is pretty sparse.

We’ve hung a few pictures and curtains on most windows, but it still seems too sterile. It’s great that we have so much wall space, but it makes me feel like we need to fill it with color etc.

We also somehow ended up with a lot of wood and leather—which I love—but it contributes to a kind of rigid decorating sense.

So for the past few weekends I have been creating projects for myself to add spice/pizzazz/color/fun to our house!

2 (or maybe 3?) weekends ago I tackled the 1st project: our prep carts.
A previous tenant left these black prep carts in the apartment when they moved. The landlord offered to remove them for us, or gave us the option of using/keeping them. Since we do not have an abundance of counter space, we opted to keep them.
They ended up, however, sitting right in plain site in the nook in between our living room and kitchen. They’re visible from most of the apartment, and I really hated the black color.

Here is the before picture:

And here is the after:

A little bit of primer, some teal paint and a few hours of work= a bright splash of color in our apartment!

What happens when the animal rescue van parks across the street..

2010-01-25T15:30:00.004-05:00

..Or the story of how we found ourselves the owners of 2 cats instead of 1 in 15 minutes flat!

I’m such a sucker for sob stories! And kittens!

When you add sob story+ kitten together you = new addition to the family.

B walked in the house yesterday afternoon and mentioned that one of the local animal shelters had a big van/RV parked right across the street.

It was already almost 5 in the afternoon and I needed to go grocery shopping, but we decided to just pop in to snuggle with a few cats.

We were there for literally 2 minutes when we noticed Bibi/Bea/Beavis (my name idea, our joint agreed upon nickname, and B’s name idea).

After a few minutes of holding her (and a lot of cooing on my end), the shelter staff started in with the sob story.

Poor little Bibi is blind in one eye, and some other (heartless) couple decided not to adopt her because she’s a little weird looking with one glazed cloudy eye.

Also, although Bibi was rescued from a kill shelter, their difficulty in finding her a permanent home over the past few months has meant that other kittens have been killed due to lack of open space.

Poor Bibi! And poor other cats!

We spent maybe 15 minutes total in the RV and then walked out with our newest family member. She’s very snuggly, loves to pur, and has already settled in nicely. Poor Layla does not seem thrilled with the addition, but she’ll just have to survive.

Moral of the story: B should not let me near animal adoption vans

Just a few short months away from getting a few extra letters

2010-01-17T10:00:00.000-05:00

I can't wait to graduate in May!
I'll have my masters degree and will (hopefully?!) have something figured out in terms of a job.

Before that happens, however, I need to write my thesis and present to the department.

As of now I have figured out my essay topic and have started to create the outline.
Since the department approved my petition to remain in NYC, I'm going to use some of the work I've been doing as the basis for my paper.

I'm going to do some sort of policy paper/legislative statement about the need for better sexual violence data, and the ways in which current collection methods could be improved.

More to come as I think this through and move forward..

Met the man..now it's time to try his food!

2010-01-16T16:46:00.000-05:00

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Tried DBGB a few weeks ago with a large group of friends.

Shared the (small) plate of mussels and the Yankee burger with cheese.
The mussels were delicious!
Tender and spicy, and the curry sauce was so good we asked for extra bread and sopped it up.

The Yankee burger with cheese was also very tasty, and cooked nicely medium rare (as ordered). The fries were also tasty, although my sharing partner did not enjoy the bucket (pretentious!). I thought it was kind of cute..but was voted down.

Also tried a bite of the boyfriend's Frenchie which was rich and amazingly delicious. A tiny bit jealous I didn't order that, but not sure I could have finished an entire one.

Shared 2 types of sundaes (bourbon coffee & apple cider) for dessert, and left underwhelmed. Ice cream was homemade and tasted good, but I thought the cider flavor in the second sundae was a little too overpowering and tart. Coffee sundae was tasty, but nothing that special.
Next time I'd go for a different type of dessert and see if those are a little more interesting.

Overall though, a great meal!

Thanks Daniel!

Foodie outing @ Brasserie Les Halles

2010-01-15T16:38:00.004-05:00

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After reading Kitchen Confidential a few years ago--Anthony Bourdain's cooking memoir of sorts--I always wondered if the food at Les Halles was as good as it sounded.

Thanks to some good news on the job front (B had a great review @ work) we decided it was time to try it out.

I'm so glad we had the chance to try the food.. but seems that Les Halles was kind of the "Goldilocks" of dining experiences.

Everything was 'almost'...
As in, the wait was almost so long that we were annoyed that we bothered to make a reservation.
And our waiter was almost attentive enough.
And the food was almost good enough to warrant 5 stars.

Boyfriend ordered the hanger steak and I tried the mussels (Portuguese style).
The hanger steak was tasty, as were the fries.
The mussels were very good--but they had not been mixed well into the broth. The top layer were really lacking in flavor, which was a shame since the broth was delicious.

Dessert was also very good, although the rum poured on top of my rum cake was almost a little too strong! B's creme brule was tasty but nothing unusual.

Overall, it's kind of a sad that they were so overwhelmed and the waitstaff was was less than attentive. I think it might have been a 5 star night otherwise!

A new take on rugelach: AKA how the pinwheel saved an old favorite

2010-01-07T11:02:00.002-05:00

The last few weeks have gone by in some sort of sugar-coma induced haze!

First I spent a Sunday not too long ago making home-made cinnamon rolls, chocolate covered pretzels, and cake truffles (aka the famous cake balls) with M & A.

Then just this past weekend I decided that I absolutely had to try a recipe I found on smittenkitchen for rugelach pinwheels.

No real reason, I just felt that it was necessary.

And so I spent the last few days covered in sugar, blackberry jam and a fine dusting of ground walnuts.

It has been a totally worthwhile experience, however, as the rugelach pinwheels might be the tastiest little cookies ever.

Imagine rugelach.

Sweet, a little crunchy, a little fruit taste.

Then think about the things you (or just maybe I?) don’t like:

A little too much crunch, a tendency to dry out.

I don’t know what it is about the pinwheel shape, but it basically sails in the saves the day!

Still have a little crunch, but there is NO drying out at all. It’s basically jam filled and sugar covered perfection.

If you want to recipe, check out Deb’s site (see above).

I tweaked the recipe somewhat and nixed the raisins for purely practical reasons (couldn’t find a single one in the apt).

The first batch also included chocolate chips, but B and I decided that they were actually an unnecessary distraction.

The best combo seemed to be just warm blackberry jam spread onto the dough with a liberal coating of the white sugar/brown sugar/crushed walnut mix suggested by Deb.

We now have 2 tupperware containers full of the tasty little bites..so if you live nearby, please come over and eat!

Field Trip Report: QUEENS

2010-01-06T11:54:00.000-05:00

Last weekend B and I decided to explore a new part of the city.

After several days of staying inside (and out of the cold) we decided to brave the elements and take a field trip out to Long Island City.

Not to be confused with Long Island, Long Island City is in the part of Queens that is almost due north of where we live in Brooklyn.

B poked around online and found a few fun places to try in the area, and off we went on the G.

After 40 or so minutes, we arrived @ our destination and found..that EVERYTHING in the area was closed!

Or almost everything.

We walked around in the freezing cold for at least ½ an hour before deciding that the Thai Express place looked the best place to get food/warm up.

After a quick lunch we then headed over to the only other thing in the area that was open (and I think, most of the reason why B chose that part of Queens to explore): PS 1.

PS 1 is the Queens outpost of MOMA, and has lots of very modern art work.

Although it was a bit of a schlep, PS 1 is definitely worth a visit.

I loved the ‘pool’ installation and the photographs by Robert Bergman. (See B "swimming" !?)

I wasn’t a huge fan of the top floor though—it was filled with video installations, which I find kind of overwhelming/nausea inducing in such large numbers.

Overall, a great field trip..and we’ll definitely be back to check out the area again to see if it’s a little more lively at another time!

Escape from New York.. 2009!

2009-12-24T22:37:00.007-05:00

View from our balcony

Hanging out in Honduras

Coconut water!!

Mayan ruins @ Altun Ha (an hour outside of Belize City, Belize)

Cruise Highlights!

2009-12-23T09:00:00.001-05:00

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Still have yet to upload a single picture from the cruise, but will (hopefully) get to this by the weekend.
Since I also have still yet to go food shopping, unpack anything other than my toiletry bag, or clean the apartment I’m also going to keep this short.
So, top 5 cruise highlights:

1. Our balcony! Norwegian cruise line has a weird booking system. If you agree to pay for at least a room with a porthole window, but do not choose the location, they will sometimes upgrade you when you arrive. I have no idea how they figure out who to upgrade, where, why..but it’s great when it works out. We paid for a porthole room and ended up with a private balcony! It was pretty darn amazing, and B and I spent a good portion of the week sitting in our deck chairs enjoying the breeze and staring at the water.

2. Mayan ruins excursion--despite the downpour, I think both B and I really enjoyed this part of the trip. We visited the partially excavated Mayan city of Altun Ha, which is about an hour outside of Belize City, Belize. It was kind of (kind of=very) scary to clamber around on the rocks and pyramid shaped structures in the rain, but worth the effort. Got to see some jungle, ruins, and take pictures without killing ourselves on the sloping and very slippery rocks..so quite a success!

3. Food glorious food! Despite cruise ships being known for the buffets, we mostly avoided this dining option. It gets kind of overwhelming to be surrounded by so many people filling their plates with food, so we used the dining rooms and specialty restaurants for most of our meals. I’m still slightly annoyed by the fact that you have to a pay a cover charge for the specialty restaurants, but B pointed out that we made out like bandits on the room..so I couldn't’t really whine that much. The dining room food was good, but the restaurant food was great! We tried most of the specialty options, including Italian, French, Mexican & Steakhouse. My favorite meals were probably the Portuguese style Bouillabaisse in the French restaurant and the steak at the steakhouse. Yum!

4. Getting to explore (a little) in new places. Instead of booking an excursion in Honduras, B and I wandered into the small town near the port. The people seem to rely almost exclusively on the tourist business brought by the cruise ships, but it was still really interesting to explore. We enjoyed a beer while sitting at an outdoor café that jutted right over the water, and B bought me a coconut to drink out of. A man with a large knife (or small machete) lopped the top off and stuck a straw right into the coconut! We didn’t get to explore much of Belize City due to our Mayan ruins tour, but we did get to see a little bit of the city and countryside via our bus.

5. Relaxing, reading, and just lounging around with B, J & WB. Some much needed down-time was enjoyed by all!

Quick Post-Vacation Update

2009-12-22T14:43:00.002-05:00

Back from vacation, and my blog looks sadder than ever!

I have pictures to post, holiday cards to get in the mail, and a lot of cleaning.

B was nice enough to do the laundry and errands yesterday, but we have no food in the house..unless you count beer, whole milk & cereal as food (which I do not).

After a full week of being pampered, I’m not that interested in cleaning the apartment and doing a ton of food shopping..but I’ll survive.

Highlights of the cruise to come!

Passion vs. Prudence : Job Hunting in 2009

2009-12-09T14:40:00.000-05:00

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As most of you know, I am currently interning at two very different organizations while I complete my masters degree. Both of my supervisors have offered each position until May, and I accepted their offers. One job is with a large government agency, and the other is with a small non-profit.

Although I have really enjoyed the networking and the experience of working in such a large agency over the past 8 months, I am not sure that I would want to remain in this type of position indefinitely. The level of bureaucracy can be totally overwhelming, and I have found it difficult to maintain my composure when I see so much money being wasted when there is so much need in this city.

I feel like I can be more creative at my non-profit position, and that I am able to contribute in a more tangible manner to both the organization and the cause. Although I have been there less time, I feel equally or perhaps even more comfortable with the staff and office space.

I have been really transparent with both of my supervisors throughout this internship process about my desire to transition into a full time job either before or around May (when I graduate). Both have indicated that they will help me identify and pursue positions, although nothing concrete has appeared.
The small non-profit, however, just posted that they are hiring a new full-time staff member.

I knew that this was likely to happen in the next few days, and I had already indicated potential interest to the executive director.

After reading the job description I am torn.

I think I would really enjoy the responsibilities of this position. It is a training and outreach position, and would require a good bit of organizational skills and interaction with community stakeholders in various projects. Although I would likely have to learn more about some of these programs, I think I could do a good job.

If I were to transition into this position, however, I would probably have to put aside all of my current projects. I am sure that someone could take over my responsibilities, but I have become really invested in my work. I know that the organization with like to eventually create a position that might encompass some of these projects, but it’s likely to take months to figure out—and will probably only be ½ or ¾ time.

I also do not want the non-profit staff/director to think that I am applying for this job simply because it’s available and I want something full-time. Although I have been very transparent about my desire for something permanent in New York, I would not submit an application if I did not think I could do a good job or if I were uninterested in the work.

I also do not want to lose out on the opportunity to (potentially) continue with my current work and finish all of my projects.

Is it smarter to try something new and appreciate the security?

Or better to hold out and see what happens?

Patience is not one of my (many!) virtues, but presenting myself as a candidate for this position while already an intern is not without risks. If they decide to hire someone else for the training job, I wonder if they will even consider me as a good candidate for other jobs. If I chose not to pursue this opportunity, am I kind of shooting myself in the foot due to some potentially unfounded concerns?

Is it worse to look overeager for any full-time work or to seem inflexible about open positions?

Lots to think about!

Thanksgiving Menu Overview

2009-12-03T16:59:00.002-05:00

Overall I was pretty pleased with the Thanksgiving Menu.

I think that next year I will add a soup and remove the generic salad (since no one touched a single bite!).

Otherwise, I think it was pretty successful.

Our dinner included:

Appetizers:

Butternut squash and roasted onion phyllo tartlets

Dinner:

Turkey

Cranberry Challah Stuffing

Cranberry & Apple Chutney

Cranberry Sauce

Apple Butter

Green Beans with roasted shallots & fennel

Mustard & Cumin Roasted Potatoes

Sweet Potato Casserole

Green salad with walnuts and cranberries

Cranberry Rolls

Butternut squash ravioli w/ sage ‘butter’ sauce

Teriyaki Salmon

Dessert:

Pareve Pumpkin Pie

Mexican Apple Pie

If it sounds like a lot of food..well that’s because it was!

I also apparently went on a huge cranberry kick! Gotta love those antioxidants!

We had a ton of leftovers, which I turned into 2 pot pies.

I used the same pie crust recipe that I had used for the pumpkin pie, and it tastes great with either savory or sweet fillings.

Pictures and a few recipes to come!

Expose On Campus Sexual Assault: A Must Read!

2009-12-02T10:33:00.002-05:00

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I highly encourage everyone to go read Kristen Lombardi’s new article, “Sexual Assault on Campus Shrouded in Secrecy,” which is posted on the website of the Center for Public Integrity.
Personally I found Lombardi’s article thoughtful and well-researched but not particularly earth-shattering in its conclusions. I think that my perspective might be skewed, however, by the fact that I spent three out of my four years at college working as a counselor on an anonymous sexual assault hotline. I also worked as the TA for Violence against Women during my senior year—so I was pretty much surrounded by the issue of sexual assault on a college campus and the very serious concerns highlighted by Lombardi. Since most people do not spend a large portion of their undergraduate experience sequestered in various under-heated rooms discussing rape and devising social marketing campaigns for students (which by the way, is really really hard when your group is anonymous), I think Lombardi’s article acts an awesome expose piece.
Since I’m encouraging all readers to go check out her article, I won’t rehash all of her information and conclusions. I do, however, want to comment on one specific part of her piece. As she explains, prosecutors are notoriously wary of taking on college sexual assault cases due to the ‘he-said she-said nature’ of most incidents and the impact of drug and alcohol abuse on recall etc. This leaves survivors with little other recourse than to turn to academic hearings. As Lombardi points out, these hearings are shrouded in secrecy and their actual impact is impaired by conflicting laws that protect academic records and yet mandate the report of campus offenses. Yet even when a survivor is able to navigate the complicated system, pressure an administrator to move forward with a full hearing, and then convince a ‘jury’ of their peers and educators that misconduct has taken place, the punishment ranges from “ expulsion, suspension, probation, or another academic penalty, like an assigned research paper.”
I read that sentence in the article and laughed. Not a happy laugh though, a kind of incredulous and sad laugh. Really?
A possible punishment for assaulting a fellow student is…drum roll please…an assigned research paper?
What could you possibly write about?
An analytical discourse on the morality of having intercourse with an unconscious and inebriated acquaintance? A Shakespearean style tragedy that relates how your physically restrained a friend and forced them to engage in sex acts?
I know I’m focusing on just one specific aspect of the judicial process at a school, but I think it’s pretty ridiculous that an assigned research paper is considered an appropriate punishment. Assaulting someone on campus is a crime. Even if the local DA is not interested in pressing criminal charges, survivors should be able to turn to their campus administrators and know that they will be acknowledged, supported, and ultimately protected. No survivor should share their story, and then be forced to endure mediation with their attacker to resolved the ‘dispute’, or see them found guilty of misconduct only to write a paper and then resume studies at the same university.
We need to do a lot better for these survivors.

NaNoWrimo: National Novel Writing Month

2009-11-30T20:37:00.002-05:00

I realized that my blog looks a little sad this month, but I have an excuse!
Although I was kind of hoping to wait until I finished the entire month, it got out this past week during Thanksgiving that I've been participating in NaNoWrimo.

NaNoWrimo, or the National Novel Writing Month is a yearly program sponsored by a literacy group. The idea is to foster creativity @ a breakneck pace! Basically, lots of people say they are going to write a book..but most never finish. So NaNoWrimo sets the goal of 50,000 words in 1 month. If you write 50,000 words and get verified by the system, you "win."

To meet the goal you have to write about 1500 words a day, which doesn't leave a lot of time for editing.

I wasn't sure if I was going to make it, but when I saw that I had almost a week left and only 4,000 words to write..I got really excited and finished the whole thing off in an afternoon.

I haven't gone back and read my entire book yet, so I have no idea if it's scary/pathetic/bad..but I don't really care!
I finished the whole darn thing!
And I'm going to participate next year.

My proof:

50,379 words so far

Thanksgiving: Menu Highlights to Come!

2009-11-30T11:00:00.003-05:00

Wow, what an action packed few days!
After several weeks of planning and a marathon of cooking, B and I successfully hosted our first Thanksgiving for both of our families in our NYC apartment.

Despite the sweltering temperature (oven+no heat control+ 9 people in an apartment=hot), I think it went really well!

Thanks Mom and Dad for coming in a day early to help! And thanks to B's parents for the lovely gift baskets!! Since someone (ahem, B) ate all of the cookies, crackers and cheese bites out of the first one I'm considering a plan to hide the items from the second one so that I can try something.

Since I'm pretty excited that everyone survived the evening and seemed to enjoy the food, I'm going to post some pictures and recipes from the meal (in the days to come).

This was one of the first times I did not go home to Harrisburg for Thankgiving, and although I missed seeing a few old friends and family members, it was really exciting starting a new tradition. Although I'm still in recovery mode (so tired!), I think that I'll be excited to this again next year.

Learning about consent? But what are we teaching?

2009-11-29T11:10:00.001-05:00

(cross-posted @ the NYC Alliance Against Sexual Assault blog)

Although I have already attended one high school reunion (guess I'm getting old!), I still have very clear memories of football games, standardized test prep, and the ubiquitous all-school assembly. There was always something festive about being called in to sit in the auditorium, and even though the presentations were usually awful, it was fun to escape the daily grind. Thanks to the conservative leanings of most central PA citizens, I had to sit through my fair share of anti drug/anti drinking/anti sex lectures, and I definitely remember at least one program that involved puppets and a scary "don't have sex or you'll get STDs message."

Why the walk down memory lane?

Well, a co-worker recently sent me a link to an organization that specializes in risk management courses for students.

I found one of their offerings particularly interesting.

The National Center for Higher Education Risk Management offers a 'consent program' for high school students, with a focus on understanding and then obtaining consent in sexual situations.

When I read the overview, I couldn't help imagining what this program might look like in a high school auditorium; a room full of students equally excited by the thought of discussing sex at school and irritated that they have to listen to some awkward guy the entire time.

According to the program, "Conversations about Consent" there are ten things you will learn:

Can men be raped? How?
Does consent have an expiration date?
Can consent be withdrawn? How?
When must consent be given—before, during or after sexual contact?
Are there different levels of sexual interaction to which consent must be specifically given?
What are some comfortable strategies for finding out if someone is interested in sex?
What are some indicators of a lack of clarity in a sexual situation?
What are common assumptions men and women make about sex.
How consent is like—and unlike—baseball.
What is the difference between seduction and coercion?

In theory, I like the idea of a consent program.

I'm rather concerned, however, with the focus of this particular program.

Talking about consent from a risk management perspective means focusing on the rules--ie how to get consent so that you do not get accused of rape.

Is this really the right tactic?

Do we want to be teaching about sexuality and relationships from a risk management perspective?

Wouldn't it be healthier and more socially responsible to teach young adults that consent is an intrinsic part of a healthy relationship? That consent is necessary because your partner's desires and wishes are as important as your own?

I don't think that parents would be thrilled if someone came in and taught a risk management seminar on drunk driving to teens. The tag-line might be "Conversations about Drinking," but the message would be: how not to get caught if you do something wrong.

Sexual violence and sexual assault is wrong.

I'm not sure that engaging in a 'discussion' about how to avoid being caught is something I would want to promote.Yet I'm sure the National Center is doing a booming business--there's nothing adults like more than to preach about healthy relationships without having to engage in the truly difficult discussions about our cultural norms and sex.

Side note: Someone PLEASE tell me how consent is both like and unlike baseball. I refuse to take #9 on the list above seriously.

Vets and guns: dv implications?

2009-11-19T15:16:00.000-05:00

I recently saw an article on Mother Jones and felt the need to comment.

Apparently Senator Richard Burr (R-N.C.) think that gun laws in this country are too restrictive. He thinks that certain veterans in particular are unfairly denied access to guns, and his "Veterans 2nd Amendment Protection Act" is necessary to protect their rights.

I wouldn't usually comment on a gun rights issue, but this one is really troubling. There's a pretty good reason that some veterans cannot purchase guns: they have been found to be 'adjudicated as a mental defective.' This means that they have severe enough psychiatric problems that the army believes it necessary to put them on what amounts to a special list.

I really don't understand why Senator Burr thinks that providing these veterans with guns is a good idea. Especially since we already know some terribly disturbing things about military personnel and violence.

For one thing, domestic violence in the military is on the rise. Recent estimates suggest that domestic violence in the military rose from 18.6 per 1000 in 1990 to 25.6 per 1000 in recent years. With the rising number of soldiers serving multiple tours in Afghanistan, Iraq and other combat zones it's likely that this number will continue to rise.

The has also been serious concern about the rising rates of PTSD and other mental health disorders in returning soldiers. Modern warfare practices have also led to an increase in the number of soldier suffering from traumatic brain injuries.

Do we really think it is a good idea to put more weapons into the hands of veterans who are already more likely than the average person to engage in spousal abuse? If the army finds it necessary to provide a special label indicating a certain level of emotional distress, I think it's pretty fair to withhold the right to own a gun. Not only would relaxing this rule put domestic partners and family members in danger, it could also impact suicide rates. We know that veterans are already far more likely to die of suicide than non-veterans in the general population, with firearms the most common method being used.

I think Senator Burr should be spending his time writing bills that would provide better mental health services to our veterans.

Instead of providing them with easier access to guns, he should be focusing on how to protect families from domestic violence and veterans from committing suicide.

Sarah Haskins on "Rape Fables"

2009-11-18T15:21:00.000-05:00

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Sarah Haskins is pretty well known within feminist circles for producing some great social critique/ comedy pieces.

I just saw her most recent video on Salon, and thought it was worth re-posting below.

While it’s always fun to mock bad commercials, I think Haskins’ video is not only humorous but also pretty informative. Usually you don’t see multiple Broadview security commercials (or any commercials) back to back, so it can be hard to notice potentially disturbing patterns. When Haskins strings several of these home security 7ads together in one montage, it suddenly becomes clear: Broadview relies upon stranger rape as a scare tactic/selling point!

It’s actually pretty disgusting way to market a product. The safety of women and children is not funny, and having an alarm system monitored by Broadview is not actually going to prevent the majority (or perhaps any) sexual assaults. Not only that, but home alarm systems cost money. Are we going to start blaming those women who didn’t spend money to protect themselves in their own homes?

Terrible commercials and a terrible message.

Watch the video below:

Disaster movie shorthand: Tornado with (!)= B movie fun. Tornado without (!)= bad

2009-11-14T20:39:00.004-05:00

Turns out I learned something today.
The movie Tornado! from 1996 is a campy yet fun disaster movie.
The 1994 movie Tornado ( no exclamation piont), is a super strange gypsy curse/devil worship movie that involves what appears to be a vengeful tornado god.

At first, I thought it was going to be a nice straightforward weather menace movie.
The opening scene involves a small boy watching his father get blown away by a tornado.
Seemed like a good start. A little derivative perhaps (a la Twister), but very acceptable.

Then the movie cuts away. The little boy is suddenly all grown up..and talking to his amulet!

I have no idea how/why the amulet is connected to the weather.
I also have no idea why the father had some type of special amulet.

I'm now an hour and a half into this movie, and I still have NO idea why this guy has a special gypsy amulet, or how his family is at all connected to the tornado god.
I also have no idea what the tornado god is doing in a movie at all.
Or why the tornado god is involved with devil worshipers.
Or why there are gypsies in the story.

Really, not a clue.
The only reason I keep watching is to see if they have someone explain the whole darn plot at the end.

So far I've seen 3 tornadoes, and 1 of them occurred in some sort of nightmare sequence.
Some sort of scary face just appeared in the most recent tornado.
I'm assuming that it's the tornado god?

Apparently the tornado god likes eating helicopters, and shooting lightening at the ground.
Normally I'd be opposed to tornadoes having faces, but since the sequence just increased the death count by 5 or 6, I'm feeling forgiving.

Basically, this version of Tornado gets an "F."
No slumming A-list or B-list actors, terrible special effects, nonsensical plot, and NO MASS CARNAGE.

UPDATE:
End of movie. No explanation. The "F" stands.

Victim blaming & blog trolls

2009-11-09T10:54:00.002-05:00

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Just a few weeks ago, a 15 year old was brutally attacked and gang-raped in front of a group (of spectators) after she left a homecoming dance. According to various news reports, the young girl was found shirtless and unconscious under a cement picnic table, and was airlifted to the hospital in critical condition. Various witnesses now say the assault went on for as long as two hours, with a crowd of up to 15 people watching. Not a single person called the police, went for help, or attempted to help the victim.

You would think that people would read this story and feel nothing but horror. Because there's really some rather horrific aspects: gang rape, 'spectators,' and a brutal assault. You might even think that this particular girl would escape the victim blaming so often seen after less physically brutal or more "ambiguous" rape cases.

Nope.
Apparently a large segment of the online community (where I read the comment sections after these stories) seems to think that the 15 year old victim is to blame for her assault.

Why?
Because she might have known her assailants from school.
Because she was careless enough to wait for her father to pick her up on the street.
Because she might have been drinking.

Salon highlights a particularly troubling reaction from one blog commenter, who writes:

wait wait wait…..she was drinking prior to this? hmmm. im not sayin its her fault or she deserved this or anything but shes 15 and drinking outside on a bench by herself in a dress….as much as people want this to be a perfect world, its not. what she wasdoin in the first place was asking for trouble. if your not gunna be smart about the choices you make, im not gunna feel bad for what happen

Despite the caveat that he/she isn't blaming the victim for what happened, this person clearly believes that women deserve to be sexually assaulted and brutalized if they make a decision that someone else might characterize as bad. And apparently, a bad decision might include:

1. Being outside

2. Wearing a dress

3. Underage drinking

It is these type of comments that make me so angry.

Why are people taking time out of their busy lives to chastise a brutalized 15 year old?

Why are these people not using the same time and energy to discuss the fact that a crowd of people spent 2 hours watching multiple men rape a young girl?

Why do people think that it's OK to "not feel bad" for a victim of sexual assault, even if they've done something you consider risky?

Cooking Club Month 2: Pasta

2009-11-06T12:57:00.010-05:00

Last month we made mozzarella cheese..and this month it was pasta!

Since I had made mozzarella a few times before, I hosted/taught last month.
This month Jacob took over and hosted everyone at his apt.
We made pasta with two kinds of wheat flour (semolina and durum).

It was actually pretty easy, although I'm going to need more practice at the rolling part!

We used a ratio of 1 c. flour to 1 egg.
You crack the egg right into the center of a little flour mountain, and mix with a fork in the center.

I was really bad at keeping the egg from running out of the middle area, but it seemed to work out anyway.

Then you keep incorporating the flour from your now rather flattened mountain, and start kneading.

Then you roll it out really thin..and voila! Pasta!

Rolling out until it was nearly transparent was probably the most difficult part.

I guess that's why they have nice little pasta machines. You put the dough through and it presses it thin and flat for you.

Although mine wasn't as thin as it could have been, it was kind of fun getting to roll the pasta out by hand. Really rather satisfying.

We made pumpkin ravioli out of the durum, and fettuccine out of the semolina.

I forgot to take pictures of the ravioli, but it was very tasty.

To make the fettuccine, you roll up the entire piece of rolled out dough kind of an a diagonal.

Imagine making a napkin roll.

Then you slice the now-rolled dough and unwrap the pieces.

You end up with lovely strands of pasta. And fresh pasta cooks so quickly!
<--We went from this

<--to this in just a few minutes.

Throw on some homemade white wine cream sauce, and you have pasta perfection on a plate!

So excited to do this again now that I know how!!

Found the little bit of good. Only 24 hours later!

2009-11-04T10:00:00.000-05:00

As you can tell from yesterday's post, I was feeling a little overwhelmed by my daily dose of sexual violence news.

And yet, just 24 hours later I find something to feel hopeful about.
In response to the gang-rape in Richmond,2 men wrote to the national PTA association to share their thoughts about rape culture and the way forward.

I thought they wrote a thoughtful letter that addresses the larger societal issues as well as ability to impact change on an individual level. I'm re-posting the entire letter (despite its length):
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We Can Change the Culture of Rape

By Patrick McGann and Neil Irvin

Everyone would agree that the gang rape outside Richmond High School was horrific. While this criminal act is particularly troubling because of the large number of perpetrators and witnesses, the incident should not be viewed in isolation. According to the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN), a sexual assault occurs every two minutes in the United States. In Men Can Stop Rape’s (MCSR) view, rape happens because we as a country have not committed to creating cultures of prevention focused on sexual and dating violence in our schools and communities.

If we pay attention to who commits rape, we see that the majority of assaults are perpetrated by men attacking women and other men. But the majority of men do not commit sexual violence and therefore are potential allies with women. By providing a blueprint for transforming bystanders into active agents of social change, MCSR mobilizes young men across the country to create cultures of rape prevention in their schools and communities.

What gets in the way of prioritizing the creation of these cultures nationwide? Victim-blaming, for one. We worry that people will hold the the young woman in Richmond accountable for her assault, especially since there were reports in the media that she had been drinking alcohol. No rape survivors are ever at fault for their assault, whatever the circumstances. To place responsibility on her is a way of diverting responsibility from the young men who committed the rape.

Outsiders typecasting sexual assault as occurring in communities with troubled youth serves as another way of not addressing rape as a social issue. In an October 28 Contra Costa Times article, one student is deeply disturbed that all the Richmond High students were described as animals in response to the assault. There were 400 students at the prom who did not commit rape. And there were female and male students who took steps to call the police. What enabled them to act in a humane manner? These students should be part of the story.

So, what can we do? First, we need an understanding of rape prevention that is broader in scope, that involves females and males, and that is based on respecting our cultures and ourselves. Historically, preventing sexual assault has been thought of in terms of females engaging in risk reduction, such as walking in pairs or dressing conservatively. For lasting change to occur, however, men and women can prevent sexual violence by challenging the attitudes and assumptions that dehumanize women. Atianna Gibbs, a recent Richmond High graduate, says in the October 28 Contra Costa Times article, “That could easily have been their sister, their mom. ...Nobody deserves that.” Her comment suggests that it is easier to hurt someone who is of no importance to us than someone who is. This act of dehumanization is an attitude connected to rape and other forms of violence. Racist violence, gay bashing, and rape clearly all share this dynamic.

Fathers can serve as role models of healthy masculinity for their sons and daughters by treating everyone with respect and empathy. Mothers and fathers can discuss with their children what consent and healthy relationships look like. They can become involved with groups like PTA to work to ensure that there are multiple ways schools engage in creating a culture of rape prevention, such as classroom curricula, after-school groups, teacher trainings, and public education campaigns. Parents should support their sons’ involvement with youth programs that encourage healthy masculinity and relationships, like Men Can Stop Rape’s middle school and high school Men of Strength Clubs.

Through our clubs, young men choose to define their own masculinity by evaluating whether messages about manhood, like “don’t take ‘no’ for an answer,” play a role in creating unhealthy and unsafe relationships. They learn skills to speak out effectively when they see attitudes and behaviors that degrade women and girls. Club members translate their curriculum lessons into public education and peer education, uniting a wide cross-section of the community consisting of students, parents, educators, administrators, and business leaders. The young men in the club pledge to be men whose strength is used for respect, not for hurting.

If we want healthy cultures, empathy must occupy the center of a culture’s core, nonviolence must be a shared value, and everyone must matter. Men and women can prevent rape by sharing responsibility and by recognizing that if our cultures are going to be healthy, everyone must play a part in caring to make them so.

Men Can Stop Rape
PO Box 57144
Washington, DC 20037
(202) 265-6530

Looking for a little good..

2009-11-03T10:32:00.003-05:00

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As most of you know, I'm currently finishing my graduate degree in public health and working part-time at 2 organizations in New York.

One of the organizations, is an anti-sexual violence advocacy organization (the Alliance). One of my responsibilities @ the Alliance is updating the blog. In order to come up with new posts, I spend a lot of time reading news articles and other blogs. Alliance staff members also send me links, and I usually end up with 2-3 posts a week.

Sometimes it gets a little overwhelming spending so much time reading about sexual assault, sexual violence, domestic violence and harassment.

Today I'm trying to decide if I should blog about:

1. The gang-rape of a 15 year old girl at a high school dance, and the (rather disgusting) online reaction to the crime.

2. The glamour magazine article where Rihanna 'breaks her silence,' following the attack by her former boyfriend Chris Brown.

3. The Catholic Bishop in NY who has been making phone calls on behalf of a political candidate, because he wants to block the city and state from passing laws that would increase the rights of child sexual assault victims.

It's actually rather frightening that I have so many topics to choose from on a random Tuesday morning.

I would be out of an internship, but I really wish that this organization wasn't necessary.

Thanksgiving..and the menu planning has begun!

2009-11-02T15:48:00.002-05:00

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This past weekend I tried to make a savory apple pie.
I have no idea why (savory vs. sweet). I just thought it sounded like a neat idea.
The fact that I only had whole wheat flower in the house may have had something to do with this decision..
Anyway, it was a disaster!
The crust is too..well, whole wheat tasting.
I'm sure there is a way to make a whole wheat pie crust that tastes good, but this just wasn't quite right.
Luckily, I have plenty of time to make a few more pies (to freeze) before T-day.
B and I are hosting both families at our apartment, so I'm going to be making a good bit of the food ahead of time and hoping it keeps well.
So far the menu looks something like:

Turkey
Stuffing
Coleslaw (B's request)
Cranberry sauce (anyone have any unusual ideas? types?)
Free Form Sweet Potato Tart
Green Beans
Teriyaki Salmon

Should be a neat mix!

Warning: Website rant about men/abortion/choice debate coming right up..!

2009-10-22T15:56:00.006-04:00

Despite what I wrote in the title of this post, I'm not going to spend a lot of time actually thinking/debating/pontificating about the message of the anti-choice website choicekills.com.

I think the name of the site makes their stance pretty clear. My stance is more along the lines of: women and their families should have absolute control over reproductive outcomes, and legislators should respect the intelligence and morality of allowing for individuals to make their own choices. Off soapbox now..because I don't see any member of choicekills changing their mind, and I'm not about to soften my stance against people who cannot respect the complexity of the world and the need for a nuanced approach to any importance decision.

What I will say about this particular site and their message is that they seem especially paternalistic.
The entire site assumes that anti-choice messaging is really only important for women. There is not a single male featured in any of the photos, or included in any of the 'stories' about women who regret having an abortion.
Despite the fact that a man is almost always involved in the creation of a fetus, their only message to the entire sex is this:

It's a supporting role but crucial. They can help by discussing Choice's deceptive invitation to a tragic personal reality. They can encourage and praise your willingness to help save other young women from this awful situation. They can show their support by accompanying you in public by wearing a ChoiceKills T-shirt. They can also help by arranging a Choice Kills Billboard and by using the bumper sticker.

I think I find this statement particularly frustrating becomes it assumes such a level of disengagement. Instead of promoting the importance of safe sex for both partners, or discussing the importance of healthy relationships in which you can discuss your personal desires for (or against) having children, it relegates men to the lofty position of purse holder. While I think it would be equally dangerous to tell men that their thoughts/beliefs about abortion are more important than those of their partner, this message just seems so antiquated.

It's so sad that we have websites telling young men that their purpose is to support their partner only if she's willing to harass or shame a friend into continuing with an unwanted or perhaps dangerous pregnancy.

Shouldn't we instead be telling men that they should be simply supporting their partners?

Furniture hunting in NYC: mostly just luck!

2009-10-19T13:45:00.004-04:00

After weeks of hunting for a specific piece, my parents stumbled upon the perfect store/piece during their 2 day trip.
Figures!
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B and I have been (slowly) adding pieces to our apartment.
First major purchase was the couch--drama documented in earlier posts--which is still the centerpiece of our living room.
Next came our flea finds, the 2 black leather/wood chairs armchairs and the 2 wooden side tables.

Then I carried home 2 wooden chairs from the Housing Works store on Montague. The hard manual labor (a mile w/ 2 chairs, a purse and a tiny wingspan is pretty darn difficult) was well worth the effort as we can now have dinner actually sitting at a table.

I also created a tablecloth out of a piece of fabric from Africa (thanks KW!) to both hide the darker wood (which now clashes with all of our other furniture) and give our main table a more 'homey' feel.

As soon as all of this was in place, I started bugging B about getting a jelly cabinet.
This caused major confusion, because apparently my mother and I are the only people on the planet who call this type of furniture a jelly cabinet.
For those of you who aren't in the know, it's basically a small not-as-fancy china cabinet. Or something like that.

I've been looking for this type of piece for weeks. I looked @ the flea, I browsed online, and then hit up a few stores in downtown Brooklyn. We had almost decided to go with an unstained version from gothic when my parents mentioned a little store on court street (homecourt). It's a pretty small store that we had apparently totally missed in all of our (well, my) other outings.

We walked in on Sunday night, found a finished floor model that was $50 cheaper than the unstained one from gothic (including the delivery fee)..and they were willing to bring it by that evening.

Paid for it at 4:50 or so and by 6 were cleaning out the shelves and stacking our glasses!

It's a little lighter than some of our other wood pieces, but I think it works.
I think we're also going to paint the extra black tables that we use as mobile counter space to lighten up the kitchen overflow/dining room/foyer area.

More apt. updates to come..

Mozzarella party!

2009-10-15T20:07:00.008-04:00

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Finally have some pictures ready of the homemade mozzarella!

Last night a few friends joined for a little cheese making party at the apartment.
3 hours, 2 gallons of whole milk and a LOT of bread/cheese/fruit snacking later...tada, we had homemade mozzarella cheese!

Turns out that TJ's whole milk is probably ultra pasteurized (despite the label). The cheaper milk from Key Foods produced much shinier prettier looking cheese.

The process is really pretty easy.
Heat a lot of whole milk, stir in some citric acid. Add more heat & rennet. Seperate the curd from the whey and microwave the curds for a bit.

When it reaches the right temp, throw on some gloves and knead and then pull.

Even though the directions say to pull it like taffy, we found that if you pulled the mozzarella apart too quickly or too much the texture got a little funny. Either way, it worked out pretty well.
See how pretty it looks all stretched out? (look---right over there--->)

After a few misfires (the mozzarella was too lumpy looking) we hit on the right strategy.
Apparently bread making is an asset, since our resident baker- Jacob- won the prize for prettiest looking mozzarella!

Here is a nice shot of all of the mozzarella from batch 2. Try and guess which piece was made by Jacob:

Oh..and the aftermath on the right:

Tucker Max & Rape Humor: Or why I'll be boycotting some misogynist idiocy in feature film format

2009-10-13T12:20:00.002-04:00

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(cross-posted w/ Alliance blog )

The National Organization for Women in New York state has a young feminists task force. As part of their commitment to women's health and reproductive justice issues, task force members keep a blog.

Another Alliance staff member recently sent me a link to their recent discussion about Tucker Max and 'rape humor.'

I don't want to rehash their entire discussion, but I highly recommend reading Jerin's take on Max, his brand of 'humor' and the reaction of both his fans and protesters.
For those of you unfamiliar with Max, here is an excerpt from his book, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell:

"My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole. I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging d***head. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world."

While I have no idea why anyone would care to read the rambling thoughts of someone who sounds totally repulsive, Tucker was able to parlay the popularity of his books into an upcoming movie.

The recent debate began to attract widespread attention when Tucker suggested that his loyal followers begin to mock the protesters (who were showing up at media events for the book/movie) by creating photo-shopped pictures of themselves holding signs that say things like: “I’m mad cuz no one will rape me” and “Women deserve to call rape ‘surprise sex."

While I have no doubt that Alliance readers can grasp both the idiocy and danger in promoting this type of rape culture, Tucker fans have continued the campaign and 'counter-protest.'

The NOW task force blog really delves into why this type of behavior is harmful for both men and women, and attracted some debate from readers. I hope you'll check out their post here..

Cheese making try 1: a good start!

2009-10-12T14:53:00.003-04:00

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I (finally) made my first batch of home-made mozzarella cheese this weekend! The texture is a little off, but it tastes pretty darn good.

Since taste is way more important than texture, I think it's a success story..but I will be trying again this Wednesday with a few friends!

I have decided that the texture issue could be because:
1. The TJ milk is actually ultra-pasteurized and not just pasteurized like it says on the label.
and/or
2. When I tried to make a small batch, I messed up the ratios. It was really also really difficult trying to crush a rennet tablet into 8ths!

I'm hopeful that the big batch on Wed. will be 100% successful!
Also, pictures to come!